The following is a transcript for the episode "Party Down".
Script[]
The quotations in the following transcript are owned by Paramount and are an exception to The Loud House Encyclopedia's CC-BY-SA license. This transcript is provided in full as a source of review and reference, which likely falls under fair use.
[The Loud House basement] Rita: "We're off to the movies, honey. Have fun at your party tonight!" Lynn Sr.: "Lynn-sanity Sr. brought you some props! Nothing brightens up a party like a lampshade on the head! Ooh-ah, Ooh-ah!" [He puts a lampshade on his his head and starts dancing, while Rita giggles.] "Huh?" Lori: "No offense, Dad, but I'm 17. I'm not throwing that kind of party." [She flips through a magazine and shows a page to her parents.] Rita: "50 ways to throw a sophisticated party." Lynn Sr.: "Oh, gotcha. So, it's more of a fake vomit affair, huh?!" [He pretends to throw up fake vomit, and he and Rita laugh, while Lori looks annoyed.] Rita: "Come on, honey. We don't wanna miss the previews." [They leave. Lori, Leni and Bobby are about to start decorating, when Lynn Sr. comes back.] Lynn Sr.: "I'd be kicking myself if I didn't at least ask." [spins his propeller] "Propeller beanie?!" [Lori, Leni and Bobby stare at him.] "And, I'm out." [leaves] Lori: "Oooookay. Item #1: Say more with great decor. Color coordinated coasters, check. Scented candles, check. Confetti-" [Notices Bobby spreading the confetti.] "Bobby, sweetie, you're bunching the confetti." [takes the bag from him] "You're supposed to scatter it whimsically, like this." [She twirls around while scattering. Just then her siblings rush down with their party supplies and cheer.] Lana and Lola: "We brought our bouncers!" Lisa: "I've constructed a chocolate fountain! It started out as a nuclear fusion device, but I accidentally dropped my chocolate bar in it." Lincoln: "And I've been working on my party tricks all week!" [He takes off his pants and falls down, while his sisters laugh, while Lori looks annoyed.] "Knee farts!" Lori:[annoyed] "Guys! Sorry, we're not doing any of that. This is going to be a sophisticated party." Lana: "Bor-ing!" Lori: "Well, I'm glad you feel that way, because you're not invited. It's just for the older kids." Lincoln: "Yeah, sorry guys. It's just for us." Lori: "Lincoln, put your pants back on. You're not invited either. Just Leni and Luna." Lincoln:[Annoyed] "What?! Come on!!" Luan: "Ooh! And me! Please, please, please, please, please, pleeeeeeease!" Lori: "Fine! But you have to be cool." Luan: "Cooly noted!"[laughs] Mr. Coconuts: "Get it?" Lori: "Don't make me regret my decision." [Luan and Mr. Coconuts look at each other shocked.]
[Lincoln goes back to his room having put his pants back on.] Lincoln: "I did not spend a whole week mastering party tricks just to be shown the door." [slams his door and busts out the trunk.] "Lori doesn't want Lincoln Loud at her party, but she didn't say anything about..." [Cuts to Lincoln disguised as a Russian citizen and talking to the bouncer, Leni.] Lincoln:[feigning Russian accent] "Lincolnovich Loudinski! I am new foreign exchange student." Leni:[looks at the list] "I don't see your name on the list." [They check the list.] Lincoln: "Uh, that is shopping list." Leni:[disappointed] "Oh. So, feta cheese isn't coming? I was so excited to meet her." [Lincoln rolls his eyes, pats Leni's shoulder and goes down into the basement.] Bobby: "Party's pretty sweet, babe." Lori: "Thanks, Boo-Boo Bear. Now for Item #8: Make your party all that with some sparkling chitchat." [grabs Bobby who yelps and goes over to some of her friends.] "So, has anyone done any travel lately? I hear the Galapagos Islands are beautiful this time of year." [Her friends don't know how to respond.] Chaz: "Uh...me and Tad went to the quarry and threw rocks at ducks." [Lori looks disappointed at that statement. Just then, an amplifier screeches and some music starts blaring courtesy of Luna as some of the guests enjoy it.] Lori: "Hey, guys!" [the music stops] "Did you check out the origami station?" [shows some origami and pushes the guests away to talk to Luna.] "Luna, what are you doing?" Luna: "Just trying to liven up the proceedings, dude?" Lori: "Well, it's way too noisy. Item 4 clearly states that easy listening makes for easy talking." Luna: "What's item five? Put everyone to sleep?" Lori: "You are on warning!" [Leni takes a photo of their little argument with her phone.] Leni: "Super cute! I'm totes posting this." Lori:[looks at the photo] "You totes are not! This is not sophisticated! Post this." [strikes a glamorous and sophisticated pose.] Leni:[takes the picture] "Awesome! You look so constipated." Lori:[frustrated] "Sophisticated, Leni!" [Leni looks confused at her.]
Lori: "Item 7: Tasty bites make tasty nights." [gathers some snacks on a tray and offers them to her guests.] "Anyone for a mushroom polenta on toast points?" [Her guests gag and Luan and Mr. Coconuts pop up.] Mr. Coconuts: "I've got a buddy who's a mushroom. He's a real fungi!" [The guests laugh and Lori drags Luan away to talk to her.] Lori: "Luan, I told you to be cool." Luan: "What? I'm just trying to yuck it up a little." Lori:[groans] "There's no yucking at a sophisticated party." Mr. Coconuts: "Unless someone eats a polenta. Ba-zing!" Lori: "You are both on warning." [goes over to her guests with a jar of paper pieces.] "Guys, who's up for some Charades?" [beat] "I'll go first." [reaches in for something to act and reads it.] "Okay." [holds up two fingers to say it's two words.] Tad: "You have to go number two." [Lori looks unimpressed. Luna sits around bored and starts playing some music with the washboard and brush, getting the guests' attention.] Chaz: "Chaz like." [Luna then starts playing music with the laundry equipment and the crowd laughs only for Lori to break it up.] Lori: "Guys, guys. I just put out some fresh salmon mousse." [turns to Luna annoyed as the guests walk away.] "Ugh. Luna, what did I tell you?" Luna: "But, dude, they were pickin' up what I was layin' down." Lori: "Well, you need to pick up and leave before you ruin my party!" Luna: "Whatever, brah." [leaves] Luan: "It's too bad. She had a real clean sound." Mr. Coconuts: "Guess you have to wash your step around here." Luan: "Yeah, or you'll get hung out to dry." [As she laughs at her jokes, Lori points toward the exit, telling her to leave.] Mr. Coconuts: "Oh. Okay. We fold." [Luan laughs as she leaves] [Meanwhile, the guests are laughing at Lincoln as Lincolnovich juggling with one foot on his head.] Becky: "Do another one, Lincolnovich!" Lincoln:[holding Becky's face] "For you, Babushka, no problem!" [He steps and shakes his underwear out without taking his pants off, much to the astonishment of his audience; Lori grabs "Lincolnovich" and tears off his mustache.] Lori:[Angrily] "Lincoln, I told you you're not invited!" Lincoln:[Protesting] "But my tricks are killing!" Lori:[Angrily] "I'm trying to throw a sophisticated party, and you're literally waving around your underwear! Now...SCRAM!" Lincoln:[in Russian accent] "They will hear about this at embassy!" [leaves] Lori: "Um, excuse me, everyone. I'm sorry for all my annoying siblings. Now that they're gone, we can get back to our charades and toast points." [The others mumble and feign excitement.] Lori: "Yay."
