Pressure Cooker/Script

The following is a transcript for the episode "Pressure Cooker."

Script[]

The quotations in the following transcript are owned by Paramount and are an exception to The Loud House Encyclopedia's CC-BY-SA license. This transcript is provided in full as a source of review and reference, which likely falls under fair use.

[It is Potluck Night at Sunset Canyon Retirement Home. Tyler is performing on his DJ station as an old woman walks by with a tray of soup, a burger, and spaghetti. Tyler blows his air horn, causing the woman to toss her food into the air. The tray lands in Tyler's hands with all the food landing on it. The woman stands up and takes her tray back, then walks away. Over at a row of tables, Lincoln walks by with a tray of spaghetti, salad, and a burger. He eats a meatball from his salad and stops by a platter of mashed potatoes.]
Lincoln: [To the viewers] "It's the monthly potluck at Sunset Canyon, which I love, because they always serve my favorite meal: One of everything!" [He licks his lips as a serving of mashed potatoes is dumped onto his tray, then he is given a turkey leg as well. Lincoln walks off, staring in delight at his meal.]
[Over at another table, Albert is staring at his watch with Bernie and Seymour.]
Scoots: "How much longer?"
Albert: "Ooh, it should be any second now!"
[Lincoln walks over and notices that Pop-Pop and his friends have no food.]
Lincoln: "It's potluck night. Why don't you guys have plates full of food?"
Albert: "We're not eating because we don't want to fill up before--"
Gayle: [offscreen] "Dessert!"
Bernie: "Woo-hoo!"
Albert: "Yes!"
Scoots: [pulls a burnout wheelie] "Move it, you old farts!"
[Scoots, Albert, Bernie, and Seymour rush off, flipping the table. They stop by the doors, but as Nana Gayle opens them, Seymour is flung across the room. Gayle walks in carrying a plate full of cookies.]
Tyler: "Go, Seymour!"
[Seymour screams as he flies to the other side and lands against the other doors, then falls to the ground.]
Gayle: "I made butter cookies!"
[Albert, Bernie, and Scoots stand over them.]
Albert: "I'll take as many as I can get!" [He shoves Scoots and Bernie aside, then he quickly grabs all the cookies and puts them into a sack. Then, he notices Bernie and Scoots looking annoyed.] "I mean, uh, they're for Myrtle." [chuckles nervously]
Lincoln: "Ahh, I get it. It's all about the--"
Clyde: [offscreen] "Dessert!"
[Clyde walks through the other doors, carrying a tray of chocolate eclairs. However, he ends up flinging Seymour back across the room again, landing on the table with the mashed potatoes. Clyde walks over to the other elders.]
Clyde: "I made chocolate éclairs."
[The elders cheer as Clyde twirls around and stops by Nana Gayle. The chocolate eclairs twinkle, and then they are quickly all swiped.]
Bernie: [spits out his dentures] "Who needs teeth when these melt in your mouth?" [He places his éclair inside his mouth, and it melts to everyone's disgust.]
Seymour: [He has a cookie in his hand, spaghetti on his head as a wig, meatballs covering his eyes, and a salad necklace.] "Mmm, and nothing's butter than your better cookies, Gayle!" [He eats his cookie, then removes the other food from his head.] "Wait--eh, you know what I mean."
Albert: "It's a shame only we get to enjoy 'em." [eats an éclair]
Seymour: "Hey, you two should open a bakery! Then you could share 'em with the world...or Royal Woods, at least."
Gayle: "Oh, I love the idea of a bakery! Can you imagine us in business together, Clyde?"
Clyde: "I can. And I'm doing it right now."
Gayle: "Too bad I don't have the money to rent a space in town."
Clyde: "And I can't withdraw my retirement savings for another 55 years."
Tyler: "What about opening a food truck? Everyone knows the future is mobile. That's why I have wheels on my DJ stand." [He presses a button, revealing a set of large wheels and a turbo pipe. The DJ stand races off by itself, crashing through the doors, so Tyler runs after it.] "Whoa, somebody stop those beats!"
Clyde: "Good idea! What do you say, Nana Gayle? We love baking, and spending time together, and the open road! You want to open a food truck?"
Gayle: "You bet I do!" [hugs her grandson] "But where are we going to find a truck?"
Bernie: "I got ya covered!"

[The next day, Bernie is standing outside a vehicle covered with a sheet as Lincoln, Clyde, Albert, Gayle, and Seymour are watching. Bernie pulls the sheet off the vehicle.]
Bernie: "Ta-daa!" [Everyone is excited at first, but then they all become disappointed as the vehicle is revealed: It is an old, decrepit senior transport bus with cracked windows and oil stains. The tire pops, and spiders crawl out of the headlight socket.] "Sunset Canyon's old travel bus: The Wrinkly Rider! It's been sitting here, getting rusty and dusty for years." [The door falls off.]
Gayle: "It certainly has...potential." [chuckles nervously] "We just need to figure out how to fix it up."
Clyde: [thinks, then snaps his fingers] "Lincoln, you're related to a whole bunch of people who are great at this kind of thing! Do you think they'd want to help us?"
Lincoln: [pulls Clyde over] "I know they would!"
[Seymour, Gayle, Albert, and Bernie cheer.]

[Soon, the Louds are restoring the bus. Rita welds the door back in place while Lisa replaces the tire, and Lori washes it off. Inside the bus, Lynn tears out the old seats and tries to shove them out the window.]
Lynn: "Heads up!" [Lori ducks as Lynn shoves out the old seat, and it crashes offscreen.] "Whew, sweatin' up a storm in here!" [Lori sprays her athletic sister with the hose.] "Thanks, sis!"
[At the front of the truck, Harold is carrying a broom and trash bag while Lana talks with Clyde and Nana Gayle.]
Lana: "I got good news and bad news. The bad news is, you got rats." [A bunch of rats pop out from the engine, then the camera pans back to the trio. Clyde hides behind Nana Gayle.]
Clyde: "What's the good news?"
Lana: [pulls out a block of cheese] "Now I got rats!"
[The rats jump onto her hat, and Lana walks away with them. At that moment, there is a loud screeching sound, so Nana Gayle and Clyde look toward it. The camera pans to Vanzilla, which is grinding its chassis along the road. The McBrides cover their ears as Lynn Sr. grinds Vanzilla to a smoky stop.]
Lynn Sr.: "Greetings, food truckers! I just replaced two stoves and a fridge at Lynn's Table, and I thought you could use the old ones." [The camera pans up, revealing all the appliances are strapped to the top of Vanzilla. Lynn Sr. comes out of the van.] "You know, as an entrepreneur myself, I can tell you that running your own business is very rewarding. But it requires a lot of hard work, patience, and compromise."
Gayle: "Oh, I'm not worried. Clyde and I are always..."
Clyde and Gayle: "In sync." [They are surprised, then they laugh and fist bump.]
Harold: [He walks over to his son and mother with two cans of paint.] "What color do you want to paint her: luscious lavender or elegant emerald?"
Clyde: "Emerald."
Gayle: [concurrent] "Lavender."
[They are taken by surprise at their differing opinions, so they chuckle nervously.]
Harold: "Oh, we'll figure it out later."

[McBride house: Nana Gayle is gathering ingredients and baking supplies while Clyde reads a cookbook.]
Howard: "This is so exciting! What desserts are you going to make for your food truck?"
Gayle: "Quick and easy treats: Cookies, brownies, lemon bars."
Clyde: "Really?" [shows his cookbook] "I was thinking more of a French patisserie: Classic tarts, macarons, and crème brûlées."
Gayle: "Those sound delicious, oh, but their prep time is really long. We need to be able to move quickly."
Clyde: [unconvinced] "Yes, but something good is worth the wait."
[Clyde and Nana Gayle stare at each other, leaving Howard and Harold nervous about their family members disagreeing.]
Harold: [clears his throat] "Well, you can decide that later. Why don't you just start baking? I'd love some lemon bars!" [He and Howard smile nervously, while Clyde and Nana Gayle agree.]
Clyde: [He places the cookbook on the counter and turns to the page for lemon bars.] "Here we go: lemon bars." [grabs the sugar and a measuring cup] "One cup of sugar." [He pours the sugar into the cup, but then he carefully shakes the can as a few more grains fall out into the cup. One final grain of sugar falls into a small space and fits just right. But then, Clyde turns and gasps, throwing the sugar into the air and catching it.]
[Nana Gayle is seen pouring sugar, milk, eggs, and cinnamon into her mixing bowl without measuring them, then she dumps an entire sack of flour into her bowl, making a large cloud of dust.]
Clyde: [coughs] "What are you doing? We need to measure. Baking is all about precision."
Gayle: "To me, it's about instinct and feeling: Letting the lemon bars tell me what they need." [She focuses on her bowl and exhales, then she places it down and giggles.] "More sugar." [She pours even more sugar into the bowl, leaving Clyde horrified.]
Clyde: [shakes his head] "You know what, I'm just going to make something else. Ooh, peach cobbler!"
Gayle: [annoyed] "Fine." [She continues pouring sugar to the point where the bowl overflows. Howard and Harold grimace at the sight.]
Clyde: [mixing really fast] "Simple sweets, yeesh." [The screen splits and shows Gayle also mixing really fast.]
Gayle: "Fancy treats, indeed." [The two glare at each other in annoyance.]
Harold: [to Howard] "We should probably step in before this gets out of hand."
[Howard nods in agreement, and he and Harold take one step forward...only to scurry backwards and out of the kitchen.]
Gayle: [stops mixing] "Wait! I know how we can solve our menu dilemma: The food truck has two windows and two stoves, right? Let's each take a stove and window and bake and sell our own treats!"
Clyde: "That's a great idea! Whichever desserts sell more, simple or fancy, will be our permanent menu from then on!"
Gayle: "May the best desserts win!" [She and Clyde shake hands.]

[Tall Timbers Park: The McBrides' bakery truck has been successfully restored and has two signs above each of the windows. One is for Nana Gayle's Simple Sweet Treats, and the other is for Clyde's Fancy Pants Pastries.]
Gayle: "Simple Sweet Treats is open for business!"
Clyde: "So is Fancy Pants Pastries!"
[Gayle is shown serving one customer, while Clyde has a line of five. Gayle serves her customer a box of bear claws, then she wipes off her half of the serving counter.]
Clyde: "Seems kinda quiet over there, ha-ha. Meanwhile, you'll notice I have a line of customers."
Gayle: "That's because your desserts take forever. While you've been waiting for your molten chocolate cakes to cool, I just sold out of bear claws!" [Clyde glances at his customers, who are waiting impatiently. He chuckles nervously and hurries back to his stove. He grabs his squeeze bag and begins topping the chocolate cakes with whipped cream. Gayle grins.] "If you're hungry, there's no waiting at my window!"
[Clyde's customers get excited and hurry over to Gayle's Simple Sweet Treats, which shocks him. He sees Gayle quickly selling pieces of cake to his customers, which angers him to the point that he squeezes his whipped cream bag so much, it explodes. He is left with a whipped cream beard and eyebrows, and he groans.]

[Next, Gayle is seen taking a pan of cookies out of her oven.]
Clyde: "Two-for-one macarons at my window!" [He has a platter full of macarons, which excites his customers, so they hurry back to Fancy Pants Pastries.]
Gayle: [gasps] "Three-for-one brownies back at my window!" [The customers run back, throwing Clyde's platter into the air. The macarons spill as the customers gather around Gayle.]
Clyde: "Free poached pear tart when you buy a plum galette!" [The customers run back to him.]
Gayle: "It's raining free chocolate chip cookies over here!" [She begins throwing the cookies as the customers run back to her. Then the camera zooms out to show Howard and Harold watching them.]
Clyde: "I'm giving away whole bundt cakes over here!" [The customers hurry back.]
Harold: "Okay, okay, we need to step in and stop this!"
[The two of them glance nervously at their family, but then they duck and slide away to either side. Clyde sneaks out of the truck and calls Lincoln.]
Clyde: "Lincoln! I've got a code scarlet!"
Lincoln: "Oh, the competition between you and Nana Gayle has gotten heated and you want to prove to her that your way is better, so you need me to get you more customers?"
Clyde: [surprised] "Yes. And you thought we wouldn't need that code."

[Gayle serves a strawberry shortcake to Roger, but then Lincoln jumps in ringing a cowbell and wearing a sign for Clyde's treats, causing Roger to throw it on his head.]
Lincoln: "Don't settle for simple! Get your Fancy Pants Pastries on the other side of the bus!"
[The customers run over to Clyde's window, which annoys Nana Gayle. The camera pans to Clyde, grinning and waving at her. But then Tyler's airhorn blasts in his ear.]
Tyler: "Spinnin' simple tunes for peops who like simple treats, which are on that side of the bus!" [He and the customers cheer, and the customers run back to Gayle's window. Clyde growls at his grandmother.]
Gayle: "I have a friend too, you know, and mine has an airhorn!" [takes money offered by a customer]

[Inside the truck, Gayle is preparing something inside a pot. She reaches for the cinnamon, but Clyde swipes it first.]
Clyde: "Sorry, did you need the cinnamon?" [He pours it all inside his pot and tosses away the empty shaker.] "Oops."
Gayle: [grabs a stick of butter] "No, just the butter. All of it." [She drops the butter into her pot and throws away the wrapper.]
[The two of them begin snatching all the ingredients, then they grab the same mixing bowl. They each pull on it, but they trip and drop their ingredients. The bowl flies straight into the truck's parking brake and releases it, and the truck begins to roll forward. It rolls right past Lincoln and Tyler, both trying to outdo the other with his respective instrument. As it does, they notice it in horror.]
Gayle: "Give me that pot!"
Clyde: "The sugar is mine!"
Lincoln: "Wait, you guys!" [He runs after the truck, but trips on a rock.]
[Clyde and Gayle are still frantically baking inside the truck, unaware that it is moving without a driver. It comes to a near-vertical drop and runs down the slope, bumping and jumping on the way down as it picks up speed.]
Gayle: "Quit shaking, Clyde! You're messing up my batter!"
[The truck reaches flat ground at the bottom of the slope, then it shoots off a car carrier's ramp and lands on the street.]
Clyde: "Stop jumping up and down! I have a soufflé in the oven!"
[Up ahead, Seymour is crossing the street when he notices the runaway truck heading straight toward him. He shrieks and leaps out of the way as the truck speeds past.]
Seymour: "Not today, cruel world!"
Scoots: "Move it or lose it, Seymour!" [She rams into him, launching Seymour into a trash can.]
[The truck rolls onto the freeway while the McBrides are still arguing.]
Gayle: "That's my burner!"
Clyde: "You snooze, you lose! OW! That's hot." [The truck rolls all the way to Scratchy Bottom Beach.]
Gayle: "Give me back my whisk!"
Clyde: "Not till you give me back my measuring cup!" [Said cup flies out of the truck. Inside the truck, Clyde is mixing rapidly.] "Add one cup lard." [The screen splits and shows Gayle reading a cookbook.]
Gayle: "And now for the lard."
[The screen pans to the shelf, showing that there is only one tub of lard left.]
Clyde and Gayle: [gasp] "The last of the lard!" [They glare at each other and run straight for it.]
Clyde: "I saw it first!"
Gayle: "It's mine!"
[Gayle grabs the lard, but Clyde yells and lunges for it. Then he trips her, causing her to drop it. Clyde catches the lard and hurries off, but Gayle runs after him. The two keep fighting in the truck.]
Gayle: "Get off!"
Clyde: "No, you!"
[The truck rolls past Mr. Grouse on a dock, throwing a bowl of pink batter on his head, covering his face. Gayle and Clyde tug-of-war for the lard tub, but it explodes and splashes lard everywhere. Gayle and Clyde finally stop fighting.]
Clyde and Gayle: [They look around their messy truck.] "Phew." [They glance at each other in shame, realizing that now neither of them can complete their recipe because of their fighting.]
Clyde: [shakes off the lard] "What happened to us? Running a food truck together was supposed to be fun."
Gayle: "We sure made a mess of it, literally. I'm sorry, Clyde."
Clyde: "Me too." [He helps his grandmother stand up.]
Gayle: "I don't know why we got so competitive. There seems to be tons of customers for both simple and fancy desserts."
Clyde and Gayle: "Hmm... What if we make both?" [They realize their agreement.]
Clyde: "Why did we not think of that in the first place?" [chuckles]
Gayle: "Because we've got batter for brains." [They laugh together and hug.] "Come on, let's get back to work."
[Just then, they hear a ship's horn. They glance out the window and gasp: The truck has stopped on a cruise ship's shuffleboard deck.]
Gayle: "What in the name of Julia Child?"
Clyde: "How did we get on a boat?"
[They notice the ship's captain walk past.]
Gayle: "Excuse me, where are we going?"
Captain: "Ireland, ma'am."
[The captain walks off, and the McBrides can only laugh.]
Clyde: "I suppose this serves us right for getting so carried away."
Gayle: "Indeed. You know, since we're going to Ireland..."
Clyde and Gayle: "Scones!"
[The scene cuts to a view of the ship sailing into the sunset.]
Gayle: "I'll grab the butter!"
Clyde: "I'll grab the cranberries! But first, I should call my dads."
[The screen irises out on the silhouette of the ship, which blows its horn once more, and the episode ends.]