“ ‘You know people are more ready to pay attention to silly games than great deeds.’ ”
After officially leaving her unaccepting mother, Callie has b “ ‘You know people are more ready to pay attention to silly games than great deeds.’ ”
After officially leaving her unaccepting mother, Callie has been living in paradise with their Papa and stepfather, Neal, but when their dad is called back to his knightly duties to help train a young prince, they decide to go with him. Despite Neal’s warnings that the city will not be accepting of them and that the rules are much different than they have been used to, Callie excitedly joins their dad as a squire, looking forward to training and winning a competition. When they arrive, they are immediately treated like a girl, not allowed to fight, and locked in with the other girls for not accepting their place. Through this frustrating time, Callie is forced to confront what the “different” members of the city already know—there is no place for anyone outside of the norm, and if you don’t conform, you will be tossed out. There is no glory here, just a list of games that everyone is expected to play and that hurt anyone who is different, even if that person is the next king.
“ ‘Not all battles can be fought with swords, Callie—remember that. And not all enemies want you dead.’ ”
I found this book, especially Callie’s personal journey, to be quite endearing and really loved having a nonbinary main character in a middle grade series. Callie comes in fighting, with strong convictions and an inability to hold their tongue, and there are both positives and negatives to this. The big positive is that other people who have been forced to hide who they are getting a glimpse of someone that is so unashamedly themselves for the first time, giving them hope. The big downside is that they don’t really have a tactical approach, making them a much bigger target for bigots, even being used as an example of what is wrong with the world. Learning how to navigate this world with all these rules that Callie hasn’t had to adhere to in so long is both exhausting and motivating, as our young knight never loses themselves, but does learn how to play the system to some extent.
“I’m more aware than ever how much I dislike the magical part of myself, and how often I’ve wished it away. It doesn’t work like that. If it’s part of you. Whether you’re a girl or a boy, or both or neither. You don’t get to pick and choose, especially not for other people.”
When Callie first comes to the city, it is evident that they have some internalized misogyny and hate everything that is associated with femininity, including magic, which is traditionally only found in girls. It makes complete sense for this to be the case, as they are extremely young and were forced to be a girl for many years, and it was incredibly satisfying to see them unlearn this hatred towards femininity with the help of their new friend, Elowen. The mindset is definitely shifting, a bit slowly but surely, from “I should be allowed to do this because I’m NOT a girl” to “Why are these gender stereotypes and rules in place anyways?” as Elowen offers to teach them some magic.
“For the longest time, gender felt like being crammed into a pair of shoes I’d never fit into in the first place. Except I didn’t get to pick a new pair. I didn’t even get to try on a different pair just in case. Day after day, I wore the same small shoes, and I kept growing. And the more I grew, the less I fit.”
Going from seeing Callie be forcefully separated from their father, the only person in the city they knew or could trust, to them making friends with the prince and Elowen and seeing how these rules oppressed not only them but everyone was lovely. So few people actually fit into the standard, in systems like this everyone is just expected to shave off the parts that don’t fit or at the very least hide them away. Callie gave her new friends the hope that things can change, or at least that there is a place that they could go to be accepted. Their friends gave Callie the ability to see other points of view. For example, Elowen being a girl who doesn’t just want to heal with her magic shed some light on their more misogynistic ways of thinking and allowed them to grow.
“ ‘Family are the people who love you,’ he told me once. ‘Exactly as you are, regardless of blood and bond.’ ”
Prince Willow, Elowen, and Edwyn, Elowen’s brother, were incredibly compelling side characters, with their own, usually big, issues and a lot of unconditional love to go around (well, with Willow and Elowen) and Symes-Smith did an incredible job of making me care deeply for them. My favorite character, which surprised me, was Edwyn. I did not have a super strong reaction about anything except his arc, which I maybe cried over a little (*definitely, *a lot). Where Callie has been blessed with two wonderful dads, the other kids haven’t been so lucky. The pain and questioning that comes with having terrible (or just absent) parents was heartbreaking to read about, as the struggle with accepting themselves hinged on the acceptance of the people that should accept them regardless of who they are.
“Being brave is being scared and doing it anyway.”
Overall, this was a very solid introduction to a middle grade series, filled with friendship and bravery in all different forms. It was very much a book about being true to yourself, and I cannot wait to continue the series. Requesting the arc of book 3 because I didn’t realize that it was the third book was a great happy little accident.
This is one of those books that made me question if i was cringing 24/7 bc i’m me or bc the couple had no chemistry or communication skills and all ofThis is one of those books that made me question if i was cringing 24/7 bc i’m me or bc the couple had no chemistry or communication skills and all of their sex scenes were very cringey ...more
If I hear this recommended as enemies to lovers one more time I will scream. This was an action packed read that was pretty predictable and had some cIf I hear this recommended as enemies to lovers one more time I will scream. This was an action packed read that was pretty predictable and had some clunky exposition and worldbuilding. It felt as thought this book covered a lot of ground but wasn’t very in depth about it which hurt my enjoyment a lot. Because we were covering so much ground, I felt like I didn’t have a second to breathe and start connecting with any characters, so a lot of stuff just didn’t hit that hard for me. The way info dumps were done (with very odd dialogue that no one would actually say and the MC literally reciting stuff to herself) felt clunky and took me out of the book as well. Additionally, I felt a few parts of the book drag and a lot of worldbuilding points just didn’t make sense. I loved the chronic illness rep but wish we didn’t get worldbuilding through info dumps from the main character. I liked Xaden and their relationship (even tho it was the worst enemies to lovers i’ve ever seen - please don’t go into this expecting enemies to lovers, it’s minor inconvenience to lovers at best) until it turned into “you’re the only person I’ll ever care about” as if both of them don’t have good friends. I loved the dragons and their connections with the riders and really wish we got more time with them! I felt no connection to the side characters and found them to be underdeveloped. A lot of the worldbuilding made no sense (you’re telling me they actively have a shortage of soldiers and are actively killing new recruits for no reason? seems a little silly) but some of it was really fun. For me, while I understand why people are loving it, this was a quick brain off fantasy that had a bit too many issues for me to fully enjoy it. 2.5/5...more
This is a really good dragon school historical-esque fantasy that centers on an indigenous young woman being made to go to a school ran by the people This is a really good dragon school historical-esque fantasy that centers on an indigenous young woman being made to go to a school ran by the people who colonized her country and it really has a lot of great things to say! I think there’s also a f/f/m poly relationship brewing?? I just haven’t been able to pick up a book in days, so there’s no way I can finish this by the time it’s due tomorrow ...more
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