Tinder Quotes

“Searching through Monster.com while on the clock feels like being on Tinder while still married.”
― Crystal Woods, Write like no one is reading 2

“You hide it well, but I can see it, Lord Verniers. You hate us. We have beaten you to obedience but it's still there, like dry tinder waiting for a spark.”
― Anthony Ryan, Tower Lord

“All the real blokes I know are obsessed with cars and have started doing cycling at the weekend and being really, really boring about it and banging on about their Fitbits and growing stupid beards and talking about being on Tinder. That's what all the 'real men' are like these days!”
― Jenny Colgan, The Little Shop of Happy Ever After

“You forgive the person and you endlessly rationalize and you forget..."

"That there are other people out there," says Seb softly, and as he meets my eyes, I feel a sudden tightening in my stomach.

Other people. What does he mean? Me?

No, don't be stupid, I scold myself at once. Of course he doesn't mean me. He probably means, like, there are loads of people on Tinder.”
― Sophie Kinsella, I Owe You One

“I quickly found the dating/hookup app to be a dangerous addition to my iPhone. A friend recommended it after shit hit the fan with my boyfriend. With enough breakups under my belt, I knew that the healthiest remedy was a solid rebound fuck or two. Tinder made it easy- too easy. Suddenly, I could sit in traffic, on the toilet, or in line at the DMV and carelessly swipe, swipe, swipe my way to dick-on-delivery. Tinder selections are based on proximity via smart phones, so there are tons of tourists, travelers, and young professionals on business trips swiping through new hunting grounds. Its loose, easy-come-easy-go method made hookups as convenient as picking up lunch. Tinder’s nonchalance went both ways. We had nothing to lose.”
― Maggie Young

“You're certainly not dressed like you're running a business."
Eyes blazing, she glared. "What's wrong with how I'm dressed?"
"An apron and a pink tracksuit with Juicy written across the ass are hardly serious business attire and they certainly don't scream swipe right on desi Tinder."
Sam didn't know if there was such a thing as Tinder for people of South Asian descent living abroad, but if it did exist, he and Layla would definitely not have been a match.
Layla gave a growl of frustration. "You may be surprised to hear that I don't live my life seeking male approval. I'm just getting over a breakup so I'm a little bit fragile. Last night, I went out with Daisy and drank too much, smoked something I thought was a cigarette, danced on a speaker, and fell onto some loser named Jimbo, whose girlfriend just happened to be an MMA fighter and didn't like to see me sprawled on top of her man. We had a minor physical altercation and I was kicked out of the bar. Then I got dumped on the street by my Uber driver because I threw up in his cab. So today, I just couldn't manage office wear. It's called self-care, and we all need it sometimes. Danny certainly wouldn't mind."
"Who's Danny?" The question came out before he could stop it.
"Someone who appreciates all I've got going here-" she ran a hand around her generous curves- "and isn't hung up on trivial things like clothes." She tugged off the apron and dropped it on the reception desk.
"I'm not hung up on clothes, either," Sam teased. "When I'm with a woman I prefer to have no clothes at all."
Her nose wrinkled. "You're disgusting."
"Go home, sweetheart." Sam waved a dismissive hand. "Put your feet up. Watch some rom-coms. Eat a few tubs of ice cream. Have a good cry. Some of us have real work to do.”
― Sara Desai, The Marriage Game

“The way to succeed on Tinder is, as everyone knows, to be a humorless narcissist with no personality because you spend all your time trying to look good and none at all cultivating a brain. You get two beauties together – a bimbo and a himbo – and all you have is a tumbleweed conversation. They don’t know anything, so they have nothing to talk about. Once the vacuous, vapid chat-up lines are exhausted – in five-seconds-flat – what’s left? They have to fuck because there’s nothing else for them to do, except go back to posting selfies and watching videos of cats. Yawn. What a non-life.”
― Adam Nostra, The Devil and Jesus Debate Tinder Strategies: How to Optimize Your Tinder Success

“In modern world, people are scared of love so, they 'like' people on Tinder.

From (The Awakening)”
― Jyoti Patel

“Against my shoulder she whispers, 'He's flint, you're tinder.”
― Holly Black, The Cruel Prince

“Beware of Tinder! England is a small island, a coral reef, where you can play the part of fisherman of souls, and can scale or be scaled, gut or be gutted...

Nagasaki Soul Huffer”
― Tom Bradley

“Beware of Tinder! England is a small island, a coral reef, where you can play the part of fisherman of souls, and can scale or be scaled, gut or be gutted...”
― Tom Bradley

“Seasoned digital daters are like lions who have had their prey killed, butchered, and served to them on a tray in their artificial habitat for so long that they’ve forgotten how to hunt.”
― Maggie Young

“Tinder, sucks… few matches I got.... How FUCKING odd is that.”
― Deyth Banger

“There is no intrinsic value in possessing most wealth, it is only powerful based on what you do with it to better the world. Lacking that it is largely just a paper weight or tinder.”
― C.A.A. Savastano

“Jesus is baffled by Tinder. He wants to love his matches, but is strictly celibate. The Holy Ghost does all of Jesus’ fucking for him. Apparently, Jesus calls his penis Lazarus because he has to raise it from the dead. It takes a miracle to get it up. Only torture porn gets him hard.”
― Adam Nostra, The Devil and Jesus Debate Tinder Strategies: How to Optimize Your Tinder Success

“Hell has had an upgrade. We’re now in the era of Hell 2.0. God sentences the wicked to an eternity on Tinder, the worst punishment imaginable, a world of limitless suffering, of boredom, punctuated by all-too-brief glimpses of hope, soon dashed.”
― Adam Nostra, The Devil and Jesus Debate Tinder Strategies: How to Optimize Your Tinder Success

“Edvard Munch painted The Scream after having a premonition of Tinder.”
― Adam Nostra, The Devil and Jesus Debate Tinder Strategies: How to Optimize Your Tinder Success

“Jesus Christ is such a bad date. If he took you out on a date to a nice restaurant, he’d keep referring to it as his “Last Supper”. What a downer. He only eats bread and only drinks red wine. If your parents told you never to discuss sex, politics or religion at the dinner table, you’d never be able to have a conversation with JC. The only thing he talks about is religion. God save us! Not any religion, just his religion. He’s fixated on it. It’s all he thinks about. He couldn’t tell you even one thing about Hinduism, Buddhism, Taoism or Satanism.”
― Adam Nostra, The Devil and Jesus Debate Tinder Strategies: How to Optimize Your Tinder Success

“If love is free, it will be of very, very little value.”
― A.D. Aliwat, In Limbo

“You can order up a date for New Year’s using GPS. Damn. There really is an app for everything now.”
― A.D. Aliwat, In Limbo

“What’s the definition of pathetic: overhearing the conversation of two plastic beauties (absolutely consumed with their image) and encountering the vacuum that exists between the ears of these people.”
― David Sinclair, Locusts, Hollywood, and the Valley of Ashes: Individualism Versus Collectivism

“Beware of Tinder! England is a small island, a coral reef, where you can play the part of fisherman of souls, and can scale or be scaled, gut or be gutted...

 

This line, ostensibly from Nagasaki Soul Huffer, is swelling into a short tractatus on Tinder that will serve as an appendix to the book. It's coming soon under separate cover from a publisher, to be announced here--and on Goo Dreads, I suppose.”
― Tom Bradley, Elmer Crowley

“Beware of Tinder! England is a small island, a coral reef, where you can play the part of fisherman of souls, and can scale or be scaled, gut or be gutted...”
― Tom Bradley