User reviews

Given the synopsis of this movie, you know that you are going to be in for a low budget version of disaster movies already done before with bigger budgets and a more impressive cast list.

And the very first thing that pops up on the screen is in itself a warning sign enough to behold, The Asylum. Yep, a movie such as this is, of course, a movie by The Asylum. So why keep watching it? Well, every now and then The Asylum do manage to strike gold and release something that is impressive and surprisingly good. "Asteroid vs. Earth" wasn't one of those moments, however.

A massive asteroid is on a collision course with Earth, and it is up to the American military to save the world, of course. And how do they plan to do this? Well, first of all by attempting to scatter the meteor into fragments by blowing it up with nuclear warheads out in space (yep, that has been seen and done before countless times). And if that plan is to fail, the failsafe plan is to detonate nuclear warheads in a deep oceanic trench to, and I kid you not, move the entire Earth out of the trajectory of the meteor. Move the Earth, are you kidding me? I guess that puts a whole new meaning to the song "I feel the Earth move".

The storyline in "Asteroid vs. Earth" is just so preposterous and out there that it doesn't pass as being believable for even the slightest of moments. And you just sit there throughout the entire movie baffled at the ludicrous imagination going on here.

I sat down to watch this movie simply because of Tia Carrere, and she actually do manage to make the movie watchable. The rest of the movie barely scrapes by as being mildly entertaining at best.

The effects in the movie is nothing to make notice of. It wasn't particularly memorable. But truth be told, I have seen much worse effects and CGI in movies.

If you enjoy disaster movies, there are far better ones available.

I watched this anticipating, even looking forward to, a bad movie. Within a few minutes, it sets up the premise as revealed in the title. As such, it starts like any of too many movies with same basic plot, and devolves from there. Incomprehensible, unrelated, unexplainable events follow, and then the movie ends. That is as much as you need to know going into it, and it's more than you will remember one day later. I feel sorry for Tia Carrere for being desperate enough to be in this movie. It is typical fare for Jason Brooks.

It aspires to the level of even a typical Syfy Original movie from Asylum, but fails. It's no Sharknado.

"Asteroid vs. Earth" tells the same old story of an asteroid on collision course with earth - however, the plan to avoid the collision is different from previous movies on the same subject. Instead of blowing up the asteroid, the protagonists want to cause a massive earthquake, 18 (!) on the Richter scale, to push the earth out of the way. Robert Davi plays a 4 star general who is immediately convinced this lunatic plan is great. So let's blow up the earth to save it! Tia Carrere plays a scientist who is more or less abducted to co-operate, otherwise I presume no person with a scientific mind - or any mind for that matter - would take part in this enterprise. If someone seriously attempts to list the goofs in this movie, especially things are technically not possible, he'll be busy for days.

The most enjoyable thing on the Blu-ray disc was the making of, when the stars try desperately to keep a straight face, saying thinks like "I signed for the movie because I thought the script was brilliant". Yes, sure, most likely that's how it happened.

An asteroid is discovered to be on a collision course with Earth. This one is 200 miles wide; comparatively, the one thought to have wiped out the dinosaurs was only six miles wide. Ouch. For some nonsensical reasons, it is decided to move Earth out of the way. Earthquakes are set to "blow up the Yap Trench" and save the planet. Taking the planet Earth out of its orbit and rotation would also kill everyone, but nobody seems to care. US military officials abduct undersea deep sea geophysicist Tia Carrere (as Marissa Knox) and nuclear submarine pilot Jason Brooks (as Chase Seward) to assist in moving Earth. They were just about to have sex, but Earth comes first...

Science fiction at its worst. Christopher Douglas Olen Ray unsteadily directs this woefully haphazard disaster movie. The plot makes no scientific sense; grade-school knowledge about Earth and the solar system are, apparently, forgotten by college students. While writer Adam Lipsius scores points with diverse characters, they have little chemistry and no community. Several take the assignment too seriously. This may be why less seasoned performers like Charles Byun (as Evan "Telly" Kitsias) outperform elders like Robert Davi (as Jim Masterson). The most memorable co-stars, Wade F. Wilson and Craig Blair (as Rudy and Terry), never appear on screen together.

** Asteroid vs Earth (4/29/14) Christopher Ray ~ Jason Brooks, Tia Carrere, Robert Davi, Wade F. Wilson

Anything from The Asylum does make one wary, as does a movie of theirs with a vs. title and a concept as silly as the one in Asteroid vs. Earth. The Asylum have definitely done far worse and there are a couple of redeeming merits. The best thing about Asteroid vs. Earth is Tia Carrere who gives a very charming performance and has a compelling enough screen presence. The scenery is nice too and there are moments of halfway decent photography, the editing also could have been far worse as well. The look of the movie though is far too drab giving it a gloomy and overly-serious visual quality, and while there have been far worse special effects in an Asylum movie they look rushed and awkward as there been inconsistency in how they're proportioned. The music is much too pedestrian and is constantly happening, when the orchestration and sound is so heavy throughout and in a dramatic sense it does get too much really. Apart from Carrere the acting is not much to write home about, Robert Davi spends the whole time looking lost and Paul Russ plays his role far too seriously. There are no characters here to engage with, not in the annoying sense but in that they are very cardboard and underwritten, and the script at best is flimsy with dialogue that is flat and at times gibberish-like and things that are picked up on but rarely explored. The story, the concept of which was silly to begin with, is ludicrously implausible to the point in places of being incoherent, any potential fun is so hampered by stupidity that it's tiring instead and the unconvincing conflicts and predictability makes Asteroid vs. Earth very low on the tension and suspense levels. Overall, there is far worse than Asteroid vs. Earth from The Asylum, but it is still pretty bad with every ingredient for a badly done disaster movie(mostly from The Asylum oddly enough) present here. 3/10 Bethany Cox

Terrible. There are no words to describe the incoherence of this film!

It tries to emulate a big sci-fi masterpiece without minimally succeed in the effort. Ridiculous scenes, inconsistent, inexplicable, too short. Simply horrific!

The plot is so badly done by picking up the nervous while you watch it.

Many many times I was about to turn off but I continued to watch it just to the disbelief of what I was seeing.

I'm really sorry for Tia, who is a good actress and should denounce the authors and the director which compelled her to star in a film like this!

the movie was not bad but what I do not understand is the earth is about to end and you had to put a gay guy in it.There is a saying, if you want an alcoholic to be accepted as an an alcoholic stop telling people he is an alcoholic.Hollywood insists on exploiting sexual preferences to gain ratings.Enough is enough.The gay and lesbian population are out there and there are quite capable of making themselves heard without Hollywood turning them into a circus for your ratings or profit.Stop already!Anyway the movie it self had some good graphics the story line was up to par and the acting was very good. But however the script was lacking.Too robotic,too predictable.Not sure why but allot of B movies with the proper care can be hits.

Oh my god what a load of complete twaddle. Tim (Tuvok) Russ must have been desperate for work. The story, the acting especially from the female lead is so wooden it makes Pinocchio look real when he was still a puppet. The Science isn't just laughable it's straight out a comic book. Please in these days if Civid-19 don't watch this even in lockdown. Go read a book instead.

There's no excuse for bad writing, bad screenplay, bad sets, bad camera work, and bad directing. Nothing was thought out nor there was no insightful preparation to keep things real. The pacing was horrible and there was no military liaison to ensure that the rank structure or feel of a military presence was kept in tune with what to expect in running a ship, more so a submarine. Being a veteran of the U.S. Submarine Force, I gave this film a chance, but using a surface ship to present the inside of a submarine???...they would have had a better set using the inside of a car garage with PVC pipes taped along the walls. Even the uniforms were wrong, no haircuts, wrong use of rankings. The list goes on and on. The angle with the young, hotshot scientist was such a dumb move and there's no real linear threat with the time and distance of the approaching asteroid.

Most of the actors in this film are washed up and probably needed the money, so they must have just been going through the motions to complete the film to receive their paychecks. I expected better from two or three of the actors, hopefully to lead and guide other actors towards a better film. But in the end, the whole thing falls apart in the first 15 minutes of the film. I held back from throwing up watching the rest.

Stick a fork in the director, his career is done.

If you're a seasoned movie goer but have become tired of the relentless big box office releases then this is the movie for you.

You'll need to nail your feet to the floor and duct tape your eyes open for the full 90 minute duration if you're to reap the benefit offered by this pox riddled flick.

I'm unable to divulge any further details, as if you've not seen this movie then you'll think I made the whole thing up.

On the upside, you'll come out the other side with a new appreciation of those big box office movies.

This is bad writing, directing, low budget Sci-fi movie making at its worst (or is it best). Some really great laughs though. I may have to watch it again. You need a pencil and paper to take notes to keep up with the plot twists. Props though for the non-traditional tertiary love story.

From a floating half submarine with a lawn chair as a control seat to such an exaggerated dialogue, I don't see how this movie even made it to TV... boy was this a sad movie to watch... did it win Golden Raspberry award!! If not it should!!

The usual Asylum nonsense. As usual, I go into these expecting that they might be, surprise, surprise, good - like AIRPLANE VS VOLCANO, which was entertaining in a thoroughly cheesy way - but usually end up being thoroughly disappointed by a pitiful movie. Unfortunately, ASTEROID VS EARTH is an example of the latter.

The storyline - which is all over the place, by the way - sees astronomers discovering a giant, 200-mile wide asteroid heading straight for Earth. Their solution is novel, to say the least; it involves MOVING the Earth by blowing up some nukes. What follows is a lot of nonsense involving characters globetrotting, some very poor explosive special effects, and exotic locales being razed to the ground.

The cast is headlined by a rapidly ageing Tia Carrere, who looks off somehow; like she's had so much surgery, her face appears to be melting a little. Better is Robert Davi (DIE HARD) who at least appears to be trying, although he's a long way from the huge screen presence he had in the 1980s. STAR TREK: VOYAGER's Tim Russ pops up in a supporting role as a submarine captain. The only part of ASTEROID VS EARTH I really liked (apart from the end credits, obviously) was the international feel of the production, with much of the action centred in south-east Asia; a change from the usual US-centric Asylum flicks.

I am a big fan of Tia Carrera--especially since I met her at ComicCon, she gave me her smile! But what were you doing in this movie? For that matter, what were Tim Russ and Robert Davi doing in this movie? Did they really need the money? Even though the budget allowed them to have some OK special effects and some CGI scenes, the list of problems could go on and on and on. There would be some interesting CGI effect and then they would be in a submarine command center that was obviously just a bunch of computers in a room and the fact that Davi was clearly not in any kind of "command center", Please do not waste your time on this movie unless you want a good laugh.

And when I say "watchable", I mean you might only check your watch a few times when trying to make it through.

This movie came off more like an extended Youtube vid about the end of the world instead of a studio trying to make a rough rip-off of other movies. If you closed your eyes, plugged your ears and just turned your brain off, you might just be able to suspend disbelief long enough to enjoy it... but then you wouldn't be able to see or hear it. That might be a problem. Or the solution.

Acting is ok, at least most of the characters weren't just acting as if they were reading cards off screen... most. The technobabble just didn't work, though. No one felt confident in what they were saying. As an actor, even if what you're reading makes no sense, you make sure no one watching the movie knows this. They have some recognizable actors and it makes me wonder if they were just hard up for money or their families were being held hostage somewhere (why else is the studio called Asylum?), but for the few you recognize, they at least know how to act and might have had fun doing it, but it doesn't make up for bad writing.

The effects? Laughable, but you don't watch these movies solely for the effects. Wait, what do we watch them for? Don't expect any kind of continuity either, one minute there is a sudden volcano erupting from out of nowhere with no prior warning and the next nothing is happening. It's chalked up to not having the big budget to keep the scene consistent, but it can't be overlooked. Practical effects = a big, fat nope. Though, they did get matching SUV's for one scene, so that's something. I'm also amused that the nukes they take off the sub are just stored in the corner of some random warehouse in the middle of Mexico (I'm assuming, considering one scene of a group of Mexicans in the middle of the road [which, btw, is never explained]) and they're just sitting on nothing more than a pallet to be moved around with a forklift. The nukes were also purchased by the government from a dollar store because they are made out of some thin sheet metal and that aluminum tape you use for HVAC ducting.

The plot just makes no sense at all. Forget that the meteor/comet/small moon was made way bigger than it needed to be, the idea of moving the Earth just doesn't work. The amount of energy needed to push a planet even just a small amount to affect its rotation or path around the sun far exceeds anything that can be thought of and to move the planet somewhere else over the course of thousands to even millions of years still requires great amounts of energy the likes we have never seen. Then, even just a tiny adjustment in the way the Earth spins, tilts, etc would not only kill all life on the planet, but could even tear the planet apart after some time just from the moon trying to pull back on where the Earth is moving. Again, I'm all for suspending disbelief and I do it A LOT in movies, but there are just some things that even the casual viewer's mind can't just let go. I'm also being very, very vague in what I know about what it takes to move a planet and what could happen because there is a lot of math and data involved that I don't 100% understand myself, but I do know moving the Earth (at least the way they do in this movie) is not possible.

There's also this strange sub plot about a gay marine and his partner which just seems extremely forced and unnatural (and not the way you might be thinking). It just comes out of nowhere and does nothing to further the plot along in any form. You don't even get a chance to connect with these characters because there is no reason to care about them. I feel like it was just more forced diversity to make it appear "brave and stunning" when in fact it simply comes off as nothing but cringe and unnecessary. I have seen movies that do this much, much better and doesn't feel shoehorned in, like someone at the last minute said "hey, we need a gay romance for no reason!". You can have your characters with alternative lifestyles, but do it in a way that feels natural to the plot. I don't want to seem like I'm being insensitive or a 'phobe', but there's a right way and a wrong way to make a plot like that work and this did not work.

I'm not sure if this is a so-bad-it's-good movie, it did hold my attention, though there were plenty of other things I could have been doing too.