Superman Returns (2006)
Kevin Spacey: Lex Luthor
Photos
Quotes
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Lex Luthor : Kitty, what did my father used to say to me?
Kitty Kowalski : You're losing your hair.
Lex Luthor : Before that.
Kitty Kowalski : Get out.
Lex Luthor : He said: You can print money, manufacture diamonds, and people are a dime a dozen, but they'll always need land. It's the one thing they're not making any more of.
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Lex Luthor : Come on, let me hear you say it, just once.
Lois Lane : You're insane.
Lex Luthor : No!
[chuckling]
Lex Luthor : Not that. The other thing. Come on, I know it's dangling on the tip of your tongue. Let me hear it just once, please?
Lois Lane : Superman will never...
Lex Luthor : WRONG!
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[Lex notices Jason staring at the Kryptonite in fear]
Lex Luthor : Who is that boy's father?
Lois Lane : Richard.
[Grant's voice comes over the intercom]
Grant : Mr. Luthor, we're approaching the coordinates.
Lex Luthor : [to Lois, ignoring Grant] Are you sure?
Grant : [misunderstanding] Yes sir.
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Lois Lane : But millions of people will die!
Lex Luthor : Billions! Once again, the press underestimates me.
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Lex Luthor : [angrily throws coconut into the ocean]
Kitty Kowalski : Lex! We only have six of those!
Lex Luthor : Six?
[laughs maniacally]
Lex Luthor : [screaming] I would trade three hundred THOUSAND coconuts and every ounce of your blood for a QUART OF GASOLINE!
Kitty Kowalski : But what will we have to eat?
Lex Luthor : [eyes the dog in Kitty's arms maliciously]
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Lois Lane : [gasps after Lex comes out of the bathroom] Lex Luthor!
Lex Luthor : [toothbrush in mouth] Lois Lane?
Jason White : You're bald!
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Lex Luthor : Do you know the story of Prometheus? No, of course you don't. Prometheus was a god who stole the power of fire from the other gods and gave control of it to the mortals. In essence, he gave us technology, he gave us power.
Kitty Kowalski : So we're stealing fire? In the Arctic?
Lex Luthor : Actually, sort of. You see whoever controls technology controls the world. The Roman empire ruled the world because they built roads. The British empire ruled the world because they built ships. America; the atom bomb. And so on and so forth. I just want what Prometheus wanted.
Kitty Kowalski : Sounds great Lex, but you're not a god.
Lex Luthor : [fixes Kitty with an icy stare] Gods are selfish beings who fly around in little red capes and don't share their power with mankind. No, I don't want to be a *god*. I just want to bring fire to the people. And... I want my cut.
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Kitty Kowalski : [Stomps into a room and slaps Lex across the face] I was going to pretend the brakes were out. Pretend! Like we talked about!
[Screaming]
Kitty Kowalski : You didn't actually have to cut them!
Lex Luthor : Well of course I did. A man can always tell when a woman is pretending... especially Superman.
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Lex Luthor : But we're not really strangers, are we? This is kind of a little reunion, isn't it? Heck, I'm a fan. I love your writing... and your dress.
Lois Lane : I love your boat. How'd you get it? Swindle some old widow out of her money?
Lex Luthor : [gushes and chuckles mockingly] That's funny. Hey, didn't you win the Pulitzer Prize for my favorite article of all time, 'Why the World DOESN'T Need Superman'?
Lois Lane : Didn't you have a few more years to go on that DOUBLE life sentence?
Lex Luthor : [pause as he glares at her] Yes, well, we can thank the Man of Steel for that. I mean, he's really good at swooping in and catching the bad guys, but he's not so hot at the little things, like Miranda rights, due process,
[under his breath]
Lex Luthor : making your court date...
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Lex Luthor : [pulls off wig and tosses it to little girl] You can keep that.
[referring to his newly-inherited mansion]
Lex Luthor : The rest is mine.
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Lex Luthor : This crystal may seem unremarkable, but then so is the seed of a redwood tree. It's how our mutual friend in tights made his Arctic getaway spot. Cute, but a little small for my taste.
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Lex Luthor : See anything familiar?
Superman : I see an old man's sick joke.
Lex Luthor : Really? Because I see my new apartment. And a place for Kitty. One for my friends. And the place over there, I'll rent out. But, you know, maybe you're right. You know, maybe it - It is a little cold. It's, uh - Uh - What's the word I'm searching for? It's a little... alien. It lacks that human touch.
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Lex Luthor : Krrrrryptonite!
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Lex Luthor : This ordinary crystal is a seed, and all it needs is water.
[pause]
Kitty Kowalski : Like Sea Monkeys?
Lex Luthor : [sighs] Exactly, Kitty. Like Sea Monkeys.
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Kitty Kowalski : Your friends give me the creeps.
Lex Luthor : Prison is a creepy place, Kitty, and one needs to make creepy friends in order to survive. On the inside, even my talents were worth less than a carton of cigarettes and a sharp piece of metal in your pocket.
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Kitty Kowalski : Lex?
Lex Luthor : [lighting a cigar] Uh-huh?
Kitty Kowalski : Are billions of people really going to die?
[beat; Luthor takes a puff from the cigar]
Lex Luthor : [indifferently] Yes.
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Grant : Brutus is... dead. He got hit with the piano.
Lex Luthor : Where's the boy?
Grant : With the mother, locked up in the pantry.
Lex Luthor : Oh, it's time for us to go
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Lex Luthor : What do you know about crystals?
Lois Lane : They make great chandeliers.
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Kitty Kowalski : Wow, that's really something Lex.
Lex Luthor : Wait for it.
Kitty Kowalski : [long pause] Wow, that's really something Lex. It's freakin' Gone with the Wind.
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Lex Luthor : [while kicking Superman] Didn't your dad ever teach you to *walk* before you *leap*?
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Lex Luthor : You're not seeing the big picture here.
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Kitty Kowalski : [about Kryptonian technology] Sounds like a lot of hocus-pocus to me.
Lex Luthor : Well, naturally. To the primitive mind, any sufficiently advanced technology would be indistinguishable from magic.
[Arthur C. Clarke's "Third Law" from "Profiles of the Future," 1973]
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Lex Luthor : Turn the camera off.
Riley : But I'm getting it.
Lex Luthor : Turn it off!
Riley : [turns off the camera and the lights go out] I think I did somethin' wrong.
Lex Luthor : No... that wasn't you.
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Lois Lane : Did you have anything to do with the blackout?
Lex Luthor : Are you fishing for an interview, Ms. Lane?
Lois Lane : Well, it has been a while since you've been a headline. Maybe it's time people knew your name again.
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Lex Luthor : [kicking Superman on the ground] Crystals. They're amazing, aren't they? They inherit the traits of the minerals around them... kind of like a son inheriting the traits of his father!
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Lex Luthor : [spots the van riddled with bullet-holes] Run into trouble?
Grant : You should see the other guy.
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Lex Luthor : Bring it on!
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Lex Luthor : [after stabbing Superman] Now, fly.
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Lex Luthor : You took away five years of my life. I'm just returning the favor!
