Eilonwy's Reviews > Becoming a Man: The Story of a Transition

When Carl was four years old, his life split. He knew himself to be a boy, but everyone else perceived him as a girl, and, eventually, as a butch lesbian. When he turned 50, he decided to become the man he knows he is.

And it’s heartbreaking. He’s overjoyed to finally be seen as his true self. But his friends and his wife are not so thrilled. Having spent years fighting the system together as lesbian feminists, they feel betrayed and resentful. But Carl perseveres, writing out the crazy swinging roller coaster of emotions going on within him and around him.

This is a very short book, but it holds as much emotion and experience as can possibly be put into it. It made me happy for Carl, and sad that his happiness was the source of so much struggle for people he loves (one chapter is a beautiful love letter to his wife; so far as I can tell, they are still married). It also made me very angry, because Carl is still a feminist, and he’s here to tell everyone that white male privilege isn’t all it’s cracked up to be -- it’s SO MUCH MORE than anyone realizes, because either (a) you’re perceived as a white male and you’re so used to receiving privilege that the breadth and depth of it is invisible to you, or (b) you’re not white, not male, or both, and a lot of white male privilege is kept out of sight of people who are excluded from it.

This book was deeply moving. I recommend it, and I’m slightly envious that my niece’s girlfriend got to take a class from Carl at Emerson College. He seems like a very interesting and energetic person, and I loved his sense of humor through this book even as he described the most difficult situations.