A tale of healing and growth...of one man learning how to love. This one was totally character driven, slow at first, but ultimately pulling me in. LoA tale of healing and growth...of one man learning how to love. This one was totally character driven, slow at first, but ultimately pulling me in. Looking forward to watching the movie with William Hurt and Geena Davis! ...more
This book had an excellent chance of making my all time favorites list—I'm a woman, I'm a hiker and I've gone through my own personal journey in the lThis book had an excellent chance of making my all time favorites list—I'm a woman, I'm a hiker and I've gone through my own personal journey in the last decade. Although I'm better for having read it, it didn't.
I blame it on a less-than-desired emotional connection. The only time I felt like Cheryl really opened herself up and showed us her rawest self was during several scenes where she mourns her mother. She had me in each of these scenes. The rest, not enough to really grab me very tightly.
I loved reading about her physical and emotional journey. I'm really glad she wrote—and I read—the book. ...more
It's both uncanny and comforting to read about your personal experiences in a book that isn't about you! A blend of fiction and non-fiction, this is oIt's both uncanny and comforting to read about your personal experiences in a book that isn't about you! A blend of fiction and non-fiction, this is one of the most accurate and insightful books I've read. Alain brings to light the human experience within marriage/life partnerships. I stand reminded and motivated to rise in love. Were I Czar, this would be required reading for all. (This would be the PERFECT engagement gift!)...more
I waffled between 3 and 4 stars on this book...I'm glad I read it, although it left me wanting. Shapiro took me back to the time in my life when my exI waffled between 3 and 4 stars on this book...I'm glad I read it, although it left me wanting. Shapiro took me back to the time in my life when my ex-husband and I were having similar issues with our son. He was difficult from birth and challenged us more than "normal" children nearly every day of his childhood. I descended to a hellish place when he hit 5th grade...and, didn't reemerge until he was 17. My husband was unable to handle things - and no one else could fully relate - so I was virtually on my own. While, overall, Shapiro's writing and character development was very good, I opted for 3 stars because I felt that, for the most part, the emotions floated on the surface. Rachel's situation was worse than mine and I never felt the raw and searing pain that went far beyond my concern for my younger child. It was a pain that ripped me shreds, leaving me broken, and required me to completely rebuild myself. If you're one of the fortunate ones, like me, you emerge a much stronger, unwaveringly authentic, and much wiser person. In fact, I now consider my son my biggest teacher in this lifetime and am strangely thankful for the journey he took us on. I guess I just wanted to connect with Rachel in this way, yet she never let me all the way in...or, she just never went through what I did....more
Light, predictable, and heartwarmingly sappy. Best for the late teen/20-something set or fans of Sophie Kinsella. Being 50, it was a walk down Memory Light, predictable, and heartwarmingly sappy. Best for the late teen/20-something set or fans of Sophie Kinsella. Being 50, it was a walk down Memory Lane. I found myself relating to it more from my 19 year old daughters perspective, who I totally think should read it. ...more
Once upon a time two soul mates reunite after unconsciously searching for each other since being wrenched apart in a past life. When they reunite, theOnce upon a time two soul mates reunite after unconsciously searching for each other since being wrenched apart in a past life. When they reunite, they are mutually overwhelmed by a strange familiarity. They marvel at the feeling that they’ve known each other forever and are exactly where they’re meant to be. The relationship launches into the stratosphere and bliss abounds. Until one day…the criticism starts. The nagging begins. The stratosphere begins to vibrate with tension, tempers, and tears.
When it comes to love, who doesn’t crave a fairy tale? Not Harville Hendrix. And, for very good reason.
In Getting the Love You Want – A Guide For Couples, Hendrix obliterates the aforementioned fairy tale with his Imago Theory. Rather than stemming from a supernaturally romantic place, Harville’s premise is that we are actually unconsciously and intensely drawn to those potential partners that most resemble that caretaker we all had…the one who intentionally or unintentionally chipped away at our youthful psyches. A mother, father, grandparent, brother, sister…any caretaker from whom we desperately sought love and approval yet somehow came up short. No, we’re not masochists…we’re hopeful. Maybe this time around, their love and approval will be forthcoming and our hole(s) will be patched. The good news is that with this book and mutual motivation, it’s entirely possible for a couple to heal their hurt inner children together.
This is far from a light read. It’s packed full of sometimes mind spinning technical information. It’s for those individuals who crave deep self-awareness or those couples who are serious about healing each other.
If you’re single, check out Keeping The Love You Find. In exchange for relinquishing the fairy tale, you’ll exponentially increase the odds of landing in a healthy relationship....more
Having spent more hours than I can count attempting to speak my guy’s native tongue, I can tell you unequivocally...learning a second language is tougHaving spent more hours than I can count attempting to speak my guy’s native tongue, I can tell you unequivocally...learning a second language is tough, but so worth the investment. Obviously, the more you can learn before you’re thrust into a situation demanding fluency, the better. If you’re reading this and relishing in your good fortune that you and your mate have always spoken the same language, I’m joining author Gary Chapman in possibly bursting that bubble. The odds are that you’re floating in my boat and you don’t even know it.
Have you ever felt kinda lonely despite the fact that your partner is in the same room? Or, maybe like you’re running a bit low on love? Do you sometimes feel frustrated that your mate just doesn’t get it? Chances are you’re one of the overwhelming many who just answered “Yeah,” “Yup,” and “Definitely!!!”. If you are and you did, I have some fabulous news. There’s a legit and quite solvable reason that you (and probably your partner) feel this way...and, this book will help.
First, you'll figure out what specific “love language” you speak. (If you're still clueless by the end of the last chapter, there's one of those fun little quizzes that will ensure you have the answer.) Next, you'll quiz your partner. If your languages are one and the same, high five and start conversing. If not, hit the book. And, remember...even with the best of teachers, learning a new language requires commitment, patience, and (tedious) hard work. The reward comes on that day where it happens...you’re fluent! Proud to be bilingual. And, your answers to my previous questions will undoubtedly change to “Noooo,” “Nope,” and “Only about once a month.”...more
I was one year out of an almost 20-year marriage and the fog was clearing, revealing a surprising gap in my knowledge. At 40-something, I was a bit clI was one year out of an almost 20-year marriage and the fog was clearing, revealing a surprising gap in my knowledge. At 40-something, I was a bit clueless about this creature called “man”. Yes, I had been married to one…technically. The past year had confirmed my long-time suspicions that my ex was not a typical one resulting in occasional befuddlement with my new (German) guy. Since understanding is the antidote to confusion, and I’m clearly passionate about dating and relationships, I immediately embarked on an investigation of men. (Next would be a study of the German culture…but, I digress.)
I set out to find a book about men written by a man. A distant memory of a giggle-inducing conversation between Oprah and comedian Steve Harvey resurfaced. I could definitely use some humor on my first reconnaissance mission. Being a man and a comedian make Mr. Harvey highly qualified on the subject of men. But, seriously, there really is legitimate substance to his resumé. As host of the syndicated radio show, “The Steve Harvey Morning Show,” he fielded hundreds of “man questions” from confused women and sought answers from as many men. The result is an insightful and balanced “man”-ual that will not only guide, but entertain, those women looking to be in a “solid, committed relationship”. Will he be getting a Pulitzer any time soon? Not a chance. Just focus on his honesty and fairness as he pokes equal fun at the common traits and oft-repeated misbehaviors of both genders…not his writing. Mr. Harvey believes men and women to be wired differently and their respective behaviors should reflect this wiring. (Click HERE to read more about this touchy issue.) His goal is clearly to empower women and protect them from those men who seek to objectify and use them making this a very worthy read indeed.
My investigation is far from complete…stay tuned for the results of future reconnaissance missions....more
Far too corny for my taste. Out of the entire 163 pages, I found a total of 8 dates...and, they weren't totally original, but variations of ideas I alFar too corny for my taste. Out of the entire 163 pages, I found a total of 8 dates...and, they weren't totally original, but variations of ideas I already had. ...more
Ahhhh...the glorious simplicity of men. What does it tell you that a book entitled Making Sense of Men has only 73 pages? If the tables were turned anAhhhh...the glorious simplicity of men. What does it tell you that a book entitled Making Sense of Men has only 73 pages? If the tables were turned and the topic was what attracts a woman to a man, 73 pages wouldn’t even be adequate to cover the introduction...and, after reading the last sentence of the third volume, men would still be baffled. Why? Because no matter how evolved we are, we women are complex...intricate...enigmatic...often confusing...and, are at the mercy of our fluctuating emotions that are heavily influenced by the calendar, our central nervous system, and the success of our most recent shopping excursion.
Written largely for the benefit of single women still looking for their “One”, Making Sense of Men presents the results of Alison Armstrong’s queries of hundreds of men. She shares the top four biological characteristics that spark a guy’s initial physical attraction and the top four emotional traits that are capable of fanning this spark into a full-fledged heart-and-soul warming flame. I’ll venture to say that most women will be surprised at least twice during the few hours spent reading this mini-manual. And, even if you’ve already found your “One”, it’s well worth read...if only to help you stoke the fire. ...more
Upon reading that hot tubs, saunas, and lazyboys return men back to their mommy's womb and/or arms...or that when they leave a mess they're displayingUpon reading that hot tubs, saunas, and lazyboys return men back to their mommy's womb and/or arms...or that when they leave a mess they're displaying "anal regressive behavior" (kinda like pooping in a diaper), my inner struggle began. Should I put this crazy book down in favor of a saner one? Or, were the occasional snorts of laughter the icing on the cake of my man education? After the fifth or sixth snort (coupled with some pretty average writing), the author's credibility got pretty thin. It was only my own anal behavior that kept me turning the pages. Eventually the laughs died down and, in the end, I did get enlightened in the end. What did I get? That men are simultaneously pulled and resistant to deeply attaching to a woman. Now rather than freak out that my guy is like the tide, I can have relax into the cycle. I will also never look at his piles around the house quite the same again. ...more
This is the second Godek book I've read and I would say the same thing with this one that I said with the other...only about half of the "ways" are acThis is the second Godek book I've read and I would say the same thing with this one that I said with the other...only about half of the "ways" are actually useful. The other half are either repeat (some almost verbatim) or not action-oriented. I would prefer he just title the book '500-1/2 Ways To Be Romantic" and cut out the fluff. That being said, I'm glad I read it...500-1/2 ways are better than none! ...more
There are so many reasons to read...to learn something new, to escape, to experience a different perspective, to improve oneself, to laugh, to behold There are so many reasons to read...to learn something new, to escape, to experience a different perspective, to improve oneself, to laugh, to behold the art of great writing. And, then there are times when you just have to find out for yourself what the hell everyone is talking about.
If you haven’t heard of the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy, it’s time to step out the cave and re-join the world. There was a time I couldn’t finish grocery shopping, reach the end of a Marshall’s aisle, or chat with a girlfriend without hearing hushed whispers and giggles and seeing several shades of red. It was Twilight all over again...and, I was curious.
I am no longer a “Grey” virgin. And, I’m quite surprised (and a bit embarrassed) to admit that this is actually a good thing.
Let’s go back to the reasons people read and see how this book stacks up...
...Learn something new. Oh, yes, Yes, YES...class has never been this stimulating! ...To escape. If this isn’t an escape, please start writing your own book immediately. ...To experience a different perspective. Not merely different, but kinda refreshing. ...To improve oneself. Most men would suggest this be required reading for all women. ...To laugh. Most definitely. ...To behold the art of great writing. Sorry...five out of six is all you’re gonna get.
Initially my groans were not coming from a place of pleasure. I honestly didn’t think I could endure the torture of the very average writing much past Chapter 4. And then...something interesting happened. I began to truly appreciate James’ insightful grasp into the complex psychology of the dominant/submissive relationship. (Now are you completely tantalized?) She effectively brings to light exactly what I had already concluded in my own life long ago: the feminists don’t quite get it. A woman who willingly chooses to take on the submissive role in a relationship is far from weak. In fact, only the strongest can thrive. She also makes it abundantly clear that without passionate love, deep respect, gentle care, and extremely open communication on the part of the dominant man, no strong woman would dream of remaining in such a relationship.
Not only did I make it to the very last page, but there are now two more books on my (very lengthy) reading list.
SUGGESTION: If you’re half of a seasoned couple, read Grey together. Every single tantalizing page. And, just watch what happens. ...more
Dismissed as one of those fluffy fillers that are overused in Easter baskets and Christmas stockings, True Love sat on my nightstand for over a decadeDismissed as one of those fluffy fillers that are overused in Easter baskets and Christmas stockings, True Love sat on my nightstand for over a decade. The only time I picked it up was to dust in and around it’s resting place. A recent change in my relationship status brought to light what I’d been missing.
This tiny package is crammed with great things and should be on the shelf of every committed couple’s library. Each 6”x6” double page spread covers a very specific aspect of a relationship. No long drawn-out chapters (destined to glaze man eyes or induce man naps). In less than 10 minutes, you and your partner can be enlightened and motivated to focus in on a single piece of the puzzle of your relationship.
Examples of “chapters” include...
Love is a Process, Not a Destination Your Sweetheart Isn’t You Relationships Have Seasons Reveal What Makes You Feel Loved Fight the Good Fight Apologize, Apologize, Apologize
SUGGESTION: When a relationship issue arises, this book can serve as an effective argument diffuser. Find the page that addresses your part of the situation, sit down, and soak it up. Then, find the page that you feel best brings to light your partner’s part. Either sit down and read both chapters together...or...use a couple of Post Its, a pen, and healthy doses of humility, sensitivity, and love to write notes to mark each respective page and leave the Post It endowed book in a place your partner will soon find it. ...more
It's quite repetitive. It's at times a bit eccentric. It's not really well written. (Although this was explained in the "About the Author" section at It's quite repetitive. It's at times a bit eccentric. It's not really well written. (Although this was explained in the "About the Author" section at the end. This book was NOT "written", but transcribed from 35 years' worth of Osho's extemporaneous talks, which explains the repetition and average writing.) It's definitely not for the conservative, especially Christian, set.
That being said...it's one of the most insightful and valuable books I've read in my 46 years. How awesome to have my personal (but oft invalidated) beliefs and natural tendencies validated by someone with the wisdom and experience to back it up! First, I've resisted organized religion...even the Eastern ones...for my entire life. Osho supports this. Second...since I started being more conscious, my primary focus has been love. Osho supports this. (Although he brought to light that I have erred by not first loving myself.) By the time I closed the back cover, I had learned the necessity of meditation and aloneness in one's life. They are what enable you to love yourself...and, only then can you love another. And, I was blissfully heartened that aloneness and love are not only complimentary, but they each cannot exist without the other. Just as my intuitive self felt, I've started walking on a wonderful path. It is my fervent hope that in a few months, I'll be able to tell people that Osho is the one who got me to stick with meditation! ...more
Laugh out loud funny...what would you expect when one of the authors is a writer for The Daily Show? But, there is a lot of actual insight into how thLaugh out loud funny...what would you expect when one of the authors is a writer for The Daily Show? But, there is a lot of actual insight into how the opposite sex thinks. Yes, it's consummate L.A., but not obnoxiously so. If you're dating, just been through a break-up, or just want a peek into a man or woman's whacked mind, go grab this book. But, be prepared for people to look at you funny when you laugh out loud in the middle of a crowd. ...more
I'll be doing a more thorough review for my blog, but I will start by saying this is a must read for anybody in any loving relationship - either long-I'll be doing a more thorough review for my blog, but I will start by saying this is a must read for anybody in any loving relationship - either long-term or brand new. You will learn so much about why things go wrong...and, how you can do your part to keep the relationship emotionally and spiritually healthy. I am happy to say that I am doing quite well by Mr. Chopra's standards...not that I am perfect in all my actions by any means, but I was able to see that my awareness and goals are my greatest strengths. ...more
The title of this book grabbed me while browsing in the bookstore one day. It's funny, funny, funny. In this lighthearted non-fiction book about a potThe title of this book grabbed me while browsing in the bookstore one day. It's funny, funny, funny. In this lighthearted non-fiction book about a potentially serious marital issue, Joan covers her attempts at fixing her low libido by following the advice offered by all the 'sex experts'...none of which were successful. My favorite chapter was the imaginary Oprah show where all of these 'sex experts' work to fix men and their insatible need for sex and inability to be satisifed with non-sexual intimacy rather than the usual attempt to fix us women...quite hysterical! Nothing earth shattering here...just a fun, lightweight read that will enlighten you just enough to come up with your own creative solution. ...more
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