We were sitting on the patio of a busy restaurant and waiting for the cheque. My little Scoutie was getting seriosuly antsy, so I pulled her out of thWe were sitting on the patio of a busy restaurant and waiting for the cheque. My little Scoutie was getting seriosuly antsy, so I pulled her out of the high chair, plopped her in my lap and started reading Garbage Monster Burp. I'd read it to her before and hadn't liked it much, but I'd forgotten to delete it from my iPod, so there it was, ready to keep her busy for a good fifteen minutes.
Did it keep her busy? Sort of. It was mostly the iPod that kept her busy and the thrill of flipping the e-pages back and forth. A little bit of it was the voices I put on while reading. I'd be suprised if it was anything else.
Garbage Monster Burp tells the story of a big old monster living beneath a pretty town. The townsfolk throw their garbage down the hill for the monster to devour, but he gets fat and develops noxious burps as the town's consumption goes through the roof. The ineffectual mayor does nothing to fix the problem, relying on doublespeak and useless "committee" formation, but the kids of the town figure out that the answer to the question is to reduce their garbage output through recycling. And they get rich doing it. Yay for the kids!
My mother-in-law may not have heard the complete story because she is nearly deaf (she has double hearing aids that work well in a quiet environment but not so well in a busy restaurant), but she loved the story, and said with a smile, "That had a good message." If you say so Mom. It had more than a few messages, actually, but I am not so sure they are all good (I'll leave it to you to decide which messages are good or not):
1. The smaller the goverment the better.
2. Politicians are morons.
3. Watson believes the children are our future. Teach them well and let them lead the way.
4. Recycling is the answer.
5. Capitalism can support a sustainable world.
6. The economy's important no matter how bad other things get.
7. Consumption isn't a problem as long as the monster at the bottom of the hill can gobble up our waste.
I want to point out that my mother-in-law's support should be undesirable for any author. Whew! I feel better now.
Beyond Tom Watson's mess of messages, the story fails on one serious level -- rhyme. The rhythm flows for the first half of the book then *BAM!* he tries to rhyme "hill" and "smell" and the whole thing falls apart. In a short kids book that sort of mistake is unacceptable. A short message to Mr. Watson:
Find a rhyme that works, Tom, or rewrite until you find something that fits your rhyme scheme, but don't, seriously DO NOT, blow the rhythm. Rhythm is what makes parents read books like this to their kids, and when you fuck up that rhythm and force me, the reader, to rewrite that section to make the rhyme work, your work fails -- and it means that I won't be reading this book again. And you want rereads, don't you?
Still, I did like Garbage Monster Burp's South Park art, so I will probably give Watson's other free eBook a chance.
Merged review:
We were sitting on the patio of a busy restaurant and waiting for the cheque. My little Scoutie was getting seriosuly antsy, so I pulled her out of the high chair, plopped her in my lap and started reading Garbage Monster Burp. I'd read it to her before and hadn't liked it much, but I'd forgotten to delete it from my iPod, so there it was, ready to keep her busy for a good fifteen minutes.
Did it keep her busy? Sort of. It was mostly the iPod that kept her busy and the thrill of flipping the e-pages back and forth. A little bit of it was the voices I put on while reading. I'd be suprised if it was anything else.
Garbage Monster Burp tells the story of a big old monster living beneath a pretty town. The townsfolk throw their garbage down the hill for the monster to devour, but he gets fat and develops noxious burps as the town's consumption goes through the roof. The ineffectual mayor does nothing to fix the problem, relying on doublespeak and useless "committee" formation, but the kids of the town figure out that the answer to the question is to reduce their garbage output through recycling. And they get rich doing it. Yay for the kids!
My mother-in-law may not have heard the complete story because she is nearly deaf (she has double hearing aids that work well in a quiet environment but not so well in a busy restaurant), but she loved the story, and said with a smile, "That had a good message." If you say so Mom. It had more than a few messages, actually, but I am not so sure they are all good (I'll leave it to you to decide which messages are good or not):
1. The smaller the goverment the better.
2. Politicians are morons.
3. Watson believes the children are our future. Teach them well and let them lead the way.
4. Recycling is the answer.
5. Capitalism can support a sustainable world.
6. The economy's important no matter how bad other things get.
7. Consumption isn't a problem as long as the monster at the bottom of the hill can gobble up our waste.
I want to point out that my mother-in-law's support should be undesirable for any author. Whew! I feel better now.
Beyond Tom Watson's mess of messages, the story fails on one serious level -- rhyme. The rhythm flows for the first half of the book then *BAM!* he tries to rhyme "hill" and "smell" and the whole thing falls apart. In a short kids book that sort of mistake is unacceptable. A short message to Mr. Watson:
Find a rhyme that works, Tom, or rewrite until you find something that fits your rhyme scheme, but don't, seriously DO NOT, blow the rhythm. Rhythm is what makes parents read books like this to their kids, and when you fuck up that rhythm and force me, the reader, to rewrite that section to make the rhyme work, your work fails -- and it means that I won't be reading this book again. And you want rereads, don't you?
Still, I did like Garbage Monster Burp's South Park art, so I will probably give Watson's other free eBook a chance....more
There is nothing I like more than hearing complicated stories in the company of cool people, and Stephen King's The Colorado Kid lets us imagine we'veThere is nothing I like more than hearing complicated stories in the company of cool people, and Stephen King's The Colorado Kid lets us imagine we've spent just such an afternoon in a quaint, little Maritime town in Maine (which felt a lot like my old home of Summerside, Prince Edward Island, and probably made it even more up my alley than it should be).
There is no direct action in The Colorado Kid. All the action happened years before our story begins. A man -- the Colorado Kid -- was found on a beach during the off season, and no one knows how or why he ended up there. But in the Maine of today-ish (is the town called Haven? I suspect so, although I can't remember for sure), two oldsters in charge of the local newspaper are passing on this story, their favourite unsolved mystery, to their young intern who they are trying to woo into making their local paper her permanent post.
The "action" is, therefore, two old men telling a story to a young woman, and the story is necessarily full of gaps. We can't really get a handle on the beginning or the end, and there are big holes in the middle that King doesn't care to fill in for us (an element of The Colorado Kid that I adored but I'm sure will drive others crazy). But for all the holes, for its unfinished and unfinishable status, The Colorado Kid is a compelling tale to listen to, and King does invite us to fill the holes however we like, as long as we know that how we fill those holes says as much about us as it does the story itself.
It's a story that tells us everything it can and shows us nothing at all. I love that. ...more
There were some things to like in Caleb Carr's Surrender, New York but not nearly as much to like as the two previous books in his NY State-verse: TheThere were some things to like in Caleb Carr's Surrender, New York but not nearly as much to like as the two previous books in his NY State-verse: The Alienist & The Angel of Darkness.
My favourite part of Surrender, New York is that it's set in an Extended Universe of Carr's design. Having the crimes in Surrender, New York occur more than a century after Laszlo Kreizler's fin-de siècle crime fighting, and having the only real link between the stories be Dr. Trajan Jones' devotion to Kreizler's "Theory of Context" (making Jones the academic and practical expert on Dr. Kreizler in the 21st Century) was inspired, and it would be a lot of fun seeing this expanded upon further. Unfortunately, though, Dr. Jones and the team of investigators he puts together (a team fairly reminiscent of Kriezler's own team), aren't nearly as convincing as their predecessors were nor as likable, which suggests to me that an expansion on the tales of Dr. Trajan Jones is pretty unlikely, especially when there are two unfinished and previously announced Kreizler novels wasting away on Mr. Carr's computer.
One of the major problems in Surrender, New York is the way Carr presents his contemporary characters. He seems much more comfortable hearkening back to the period of his own academic pursuits -- turn of the 20th Century New York -- when crafting personae than he is dealing with the people of today, although some of that might be up to myself and my own biases. Whether the problem is him or me -- or a bit of us both -- the fact is that I had a hard time caring about the quirky band in Surrender, New York.
And it may actually be the quirks themselves that caused me to distance myself emotionally from his characters. Peculiarities in characters can help define them, give them depth, or at the very least give them colour, but when someone like Trajan Jones has as many quirks as he does -- from a prosthetic leg to a Junkers Bomber turned personal crime lab to a pet cheetah and on and on -- it can be distracting, at least, and even downright silly.
Still, the crime being investigated in Surrender, New York is fascinating, the action is mildly satisfying, and there was more than enough in the characters, despite their flaws, to keep me interested throughout. I think this novel suffers a bit due to my love for the previous Kreizler novels, and I would certainly read another Dr. Jones story; I'd just rather read another Dr. Kreizler case (or even a fictionalized version of the papers Kreizler left behind that Jones uses as the basis of his work).
Regardless, I will keep my fingers crossed that something from Carr's NY State-verse will hit the shelves sooner rather than later. ...more
Let me begin with the one thing I didn't like about Sizzle: the absolute shit narration from Brian Pallino.
Pallino sounds angry -- all the time -- andLet me begin with the one thing I didn't like about Sizzle: the absolute shit narration from Brian Pallino.
Pallino sounds angry -- all the time -- and on the rare occasions when he's supposed to sound angry, he sounds angry still, just a little louder. It's like watching Andrew Shue back in the Melrose Place days where the "Many Faces of Billy" -- no matter the emotion -- were the one face of Billy: glazed over, wishing he was still playing football, Andrew Shue. To make matters worse, though (and this is in no way the fault of Whitley Green, Pallino's character, Elliot, is described by Joelle (read by the quite lovely Meg Sylvan) to have a voice that exudes sexuality; his voice is so dreamy and sexy, we're told, that he should read audiobooks (note to audiobook directors: just because someone DOES read audiobooks DOESN'T mean they should, nor that they are good at it). Now had Joelle been describing Alex (read invitingly by CJ Mission), the gushing praise would have been closer to the mark, and it wouldn't have been so jarringly inappropriate (even though it wouldn't have been entirely accurate either). But nope, Joelle was describing Elliot, and the crapness of Elliot's narrator made it absolutely impossible for me to immerse myself in the story (or the smut) when Pallino was narrating. I don't even think viagra would have overcome Pallino's power to turn me off.
So yeah ... had Pallino not read a third of this book, I'd be giving it the full compliment of stars.
I enjoyed both other narrators, the smut was nice and smutty, the balance of the erotic scenes was solid (even if I would have preferred more), the easy embrace of bisexuality (and polyamory) amongst those close to our protagonists was refreshing and kept the focus on the sex and sexuality, and the surrounding plot was actually pretty interesting ... interesting enough that I was disappointed to discover that the second book in the Sizzle TV series was not about Joelle and Alex and Elliot. I really wanted to see where their MMF relationship went, and I wanted to see Joelle to get a little more oral loving for herself. C'est la vie. I'll read Smoke all the same....more
There is a whole lot of fun and a whole lot of excellence packed into this "Complete" audio collection of X Minus One. I use the quotes a touch ironicThere is a whole lot of fun and a whole lot of excellence packed into this "Complete" audio collection of X Minus One. I use the quotes a touch ironically here because this collection isn't quite complete, which makes me a little sad, but considering that some of the best episodes got replayed in this collection just as they did in the Fifties, I'm not going to hold the missing episodes against the collection.
As with any old time radio collection, there is some inconsistent quality when it comes to performances, and X Minus One struggles with an added level of inconsistency when it comes to the quality of the adaptations from Sci-Fi short stories to Sci-Fi radio plays, yet this collection doesn't suffer from these inconsistencies as much as something like CBS Radio Mystery Theatre does. And the audio quality of this collection (especially considering the episodes were all recorded in the '50s) is superior to most of its brethren.
I don't feel any great need to single out stinker episodes, but I do want to mention my two favourites: "The Tunnel Under the World" by Fredrik Pohl and "Saucer of Loneliness by Theodore Sturgeon. The former is a famous enough work to make Tom Shippey's fantastic collection, The Oxford Book of Science Fiction Stories, and the latter is so perfectly touching that I want to adapt it for the stage my own self. Even if you don't listen to this whole collection, I urge you to hunt these two tales down on the web. If you love old time radio, I think you'll be happy to listen to them both....more
Does the ending hold up? Nope. Not in a million years.
AreIs this a fun book? Yes.
Is this a good book? Maybe-ish.
Does this book make sense? Not really.
Does the ending hold up? Nope. Not in a million years.
Are there likable characters in there? Well ...
Talking about characters: Enzo -- ridiculous; Millie -- sociopath; Nina -- oddly cool but unethical; Cecelia -- whatever; Detective Connors -- don't blink. You'll miss him; Andrew -- I guess he's evil, but not as evil as Millie (who we are supposed to side with).
For a while now, I've found myself drifting further and further away from podcasts. I climbed aboard the podcast train very early on, and gravitated tFor a while now, I've found myself drifting further and further away from podcasts. I climbed aboard the podcast train very early on, and gravitated towards the supernatural and true crime pods. But I grew tired of hearing multiple takes on the same batch of cryptids or haunted houses or cults or murderers, and the mostly amateur sleuthing about and readings of those topics started to seriously bore me, so I moved back to more academic histories and creepy fictions.
I couldn't help myself, though. After a while, the itch for the creepy and weird pouring into my ears though some disembodied voice(s) came back, and right about the time it did I found Colin Dickey's Ghostland: An American History in Haunted Places on sale on audible. All I registered in the title was "Haunted Places" -- which screamed "SUPERNATURAL" to me -- and that was enough to shelve it and dive into some spooky places.
What I got was a surprise that shouldn't have surprised me because it was right in the title. Ghostland is first and foremost "An American History." Yes it is about "Haunted Places," but it is about what those haunted places can tell us about U.S. American history, what they can tell us about the U.S. as a society, what they can tell us about trauma in the American psyche. The places are incidental. They house the damage and crimes and exploitations of centuries of hurt, and those things are all morphed into mythology, ghosts of the traumas the country has undergone, has self-inflicted, has inflicted on others, places that contain the ruins of a country now aging itself into obsolescence.
Dickey argues that America's haunted places spring from the classism, racism and inequality at the heart of a nation that likes to believe it is more than it is, while carrying a history of deep divides, genocides, slavery, and failures to care for its most vulnerable citizens. And because of those traumas, ghosts spring up on Hurricane Katrina ravaged street corners, Civil War Battlefields, in the ruins of dying cities, in the strange houses of the eccentric or the psychopathic rich, in every corner of a country uneasy with itself and its history whether it recognizes it or not.
Ghostland was much more than I signed up for, and much better than I hoped. I would love to see something similar written about Canada and our Haunted Places. ...more
A solid introduction to the eminently likable Travis McGee and his unique brand of sleuthing -- a sort of Beach Bum Remington Steele with shades of thA solid introduction to the eminently likable Travis McGee and his unique brand of sleuthing -- a sort of Beach Bum Remington Steele with shades of the A-Team.
He is an ethical man of the '60s, a man ahead of his time in many ways, especially in his treatment of women (which means that his treatment of women is admittedly lacking by today's standards but was pretty bas ass for its day), and he is a smart man who sees the world very much as it is. He is also a potentially violent man, a man who doesn't seek violence in a sadistic way, but he is a man who will be pragmatically sadistic if he thinks its required and doesn't go against his ethics.
It blows my mind that I can only find two screen adaptations of Travis McGee stories. It might behoove creative types to stop remaking worn out TV and movie heroes, and find their way back to the heroes and anti-heroes that populate countless novels for some new inspiration and some killer ideas.
Anywho ... The Deep Blue Good-By is an excellent start to a series that extends to twenty-one titles. It is sometimes scary, always atmospheric, occasionally sexy, often stressful, and it contains one of the coolest chases / final confrontations I've ever read in detective fiction.
If only Jeff Bridges was thirty again. He could make Travis McGee into an unstoppable franchise.
p.s. if you happen to be someone who pays attention to readers' "Challenge" lists you will notice that The Deep Blue Good-By is listed on mine back to back. This is because I listened to the Brilliance Audio book in tandem with reading the paperback. I wanted to try something out (which I did), and I planned to write a second review. Unfortunately, it doesn't seem like I can write a second review anymore. Oh well. Sorry, folks....more
The Carter of 'La Providence' is the fourth Maigret book I've read -- even though the order tells me it is the second in the series -- and in the fourThe Carter of 'La Providence' is the fourth Maigret book I've read -- even though the order tells me it is the second in the series -- and in the four Maigret cases I have read not a single person has been charged with a crime. Maigret is faced with a puzzle; Maigret solves the puzzle; and for whatever reason -- sometimes chance, sometimes a decision by the great detective -- the puzzle doesn't end in a moment of incarceration, a trial, or anything more than Maigret putting on his hat and walking away.
I like it that way and long may it continue.
This time around, Maigret is working on what turns into a couple of murders along the canals. One murder brings him there, another ups the stakes, and it is up to Maigret to find the culprit while the business of barges moving up and down the canals continues unabated.
Simenon creates a really nice tension for us and his detective by using the landscape of the canalside, along with the pressure of commerce to keep goods and services moving, which makes it feel like the solution to the puzzle of The Carter of 'La Providence' may go unsolved despite Maigret's Tour de France-level physical output.
Much as I enjoyed The Carter of 'La Providence', I did find myself setting it down for a couple of weeks in the middle of my read. It was easy to get back into, but I didn't find this second book as compelling as The Hanged Man of Saint-Pholien. I hope A Man's Head reads like a sprint rather than an interval hike.
It sure would be fun, though, to see Gerard Depardieu (or some other similarly bulky French actor) riding a rickety old bicycle up and down the cobbled paths beside the canals on the verge of a coronary. Someone other than the Brits need to make some Maigret stories into killer television. ...more
There is "oh! so much" guilt to go around in Georges Simenon's The Hanged Man of Saint-Pholien that it becomes clear quite early on that this is anothThere is "oh! so much" guilt to go around in Georges Simenon's The Hanged Man of Saint-Pholien that it becomes clear quite early on that this is another case where Maigret is only at work to solve the mystery for himself, and that our idealistic visions of "justice" (whatever that even means) must go unfulfilled. And considering all the guilt floating around this is perfectly acceptable.
In fact, it is Maigret's personal motivations that keep me pressing on in the series. Nothing is easy, nothing is pat, there is very little black, very little white, since the muddiness of the greys is the norm, and Maigret plays by an ethos that is all his own.
One bit of extra fun: of the three Maigret books so far, The Hanged Man of Saint-Pholien contains my favourite chase. But it isn't the sort of chase you might expect, nothing full of action or danger; it is a chase where one man stays one step ahead of another in an attempt to cover up all traces of something that happened long, long ago. It's an intellectual thrill, and the victor's victory is all the sweeter for the mental sparring.
I am out of order in my readings so far because I read what I can get my hands on, but I don't think my experience with Maigret is suffering. The novels are all stand alone enough, and he is so well drawn, that I feel I could read this series in almost any order and close the last cover with an experience as rewarding as someone who read them all in the proper sequence. ...more
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