Slash - The Evil Turtle from Dimension X/Transcript

[Opening sequence and theme song.]

[Episode begins with the turtles walking through the sewer tunnels.]

Michelangelo "I'm telling you I saw some guys down here."

Donatello "So? They were probably maintenance men."

Michelangelo "No way, bud. They looked more like businessmen."

Raphael "Michelangelo, what did we tell you about eating jellybean and sausage pizzas before you go to sleep?"

Michelangelo "I didn't dream this, compadre! They were right here!"

[They hear a clattering sound and lower their voices.]

Leonardo "Everyone, be careful."

Raphael "Yeah, they might be autograph-hunters."

[In another section of the tunnels, a rotund man dressed in a business suit addresses a group of hard-hatted workers.]

Fenton Q. Hackenbrush "Okay, boys. Get to work."

[A jackhammer starts up. The turtles reach the source of the noise and see the workers tearing up a section of the tunnel.]

Leonardo "Nobody make a sound."

Raphael "They can't do that to our sewers!

[The turtles attack.]

Yah!"

[The turtles begin yanking the tools from the worker's hands.]

Leonardo "Heeyah!"

Michelangelo "Cowabunga!"

Hackenbrush "Just what do you think you're doing? These aren't your sewers."

Raphael "Yeah? Well, it ain't yours either, spunky."

Leonardo "And unless you can show us an official city I.D., I suggest you get out of here."

Hackenbrush "I've heard about you turtles. You're nothing but a bunch of trouble-makers. And in a few days, all this will belong to Donald J. Lofty.

[He starts to leave but turns for a last parting shot.]

You green pests haven't seen the last of me!"

Raphael "Well, there's a pleasant thought for the day."

Leonardo "Guys, I think we have a bit of a problem on our hands."

[Cut to the Technodrome, in Dimension X. Shredder is experimenting. Bebop and Rocksteady are wearing aprons and dusters.]

Rocksteady "What are you doing, boss?"

Shredder "None of your business."

Bebop "Aw, gee, we just wanna help."

Krang "You can help by getting back to your cleaning duties! With this new super-charged mutagen, we can create an entire army of super-mutants."

Shredder "No force on Earth will be able to stop us. We'll rule the world!"

Krang "We'll conquer the universe!"

Bebop "Oh, goody!"

[He swings his arm and breaks off a part of the machine Shredder and Krang are using.]

Krang "You klutz. Look what you've done!"

Shredder "Just for that, you'll clean all of the Technodrome's lower decks!"

Rocksteady "Aw, all of them?"

Krang "Now we'll have to repair this electrode before we can proceed with the experiments."

[Rocksteady and Bebop are below decks, performing their cleaning duties.]

Bebop "Boy, it's gonna take us weeks to get this place cleaned up. It sure would go quicker if we had some help."

Rocksteady "What we need is someone to do all our work like the boss has."

Bebop "Yeah, but the boss has a pair of—"

Both "Mutants!"

Rocksteady "Ooh, ooh! If we could get our hands on a little of that new super mutagen--"

Bebop "We could have our own mutants! We'd never have to work again."

Rocksteady "Aw, but we ain't got no animals to mutate."

Bebop "Yes, we do. My pet Slash."

Rocksteady "You got a pet? How come you never told me?"

Bebop "Uh, oh, well, uh, you'll see."

[Closeup of April O’Neil doing an onsite report and interview.]

April "Welcome to another edition of Face the Issues, the show that puts the issues right in your face. My guest on location today is Fenton Q. Hackenbrush, developer for Donald J. Lofty Enterprises. Mr. Hackenbrush, since you took charge, Lofty Enterprises has begun some rather unusual projects, such as the controversial space scow, designed to carry millions of tons of trash into space."

Hackenbrush "Yes, Miss O'Neil. This is our solution to the city's mounting garbage problem."

April "And what about the mysterious sewer project Lofty Enterprises is involved with?"

[The turtles watch the news report on the TV in their lair.]

Raphael "Yeah, nutball. What about it?"

Hackenbrush "Nothing mysterious about it. We've offered to refurbish the city's entire sewer system in exchange for the rights to develop a small portion of the sewers for commercial use."

Raphael "Huh, a "small portion"?"

Leonardo "He said it was all going to belong to Donald Lofty."

Hackenbrush "In addition, it will help to flush out the worst menace in the city, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. They're a bunch of reptilian delinquents and we demand that they be put behind bars. Or at least in a really big glass bowl."

Raphael "Okay, that settles it.

[He shuts off the TV.]

This jerk doesn't get to be a charter member of our fan club."

Michelangelo "Yeah, you think that dude's trying to pull a fast one on the city?"

Leonardo "He's up to something and we've got to find out what it is."

[Inside Bebop’s room in the Technodrome, he prepares to show Rocksteady his pet.]

Bebop "Here, Slash. Daddy has a friend for you to meet."

[He pulls a glass bowl from under the bed. Inside is a tiny turtle along with a little oasis that includes a palm tree. Rocksteady gasps as Bebop lifts the turtle out of the bowl.]

Rocksteady "Boy, now I see why you never told nobody. The boss would really be ticked if he found out you had a pet turtle."

Bebop "You got the goop? [He sets Slash down on a table.] Quick! We gotta pour it on.

[Slash disappears under a pile of books.]

Slash? Where'd he go?

[He retrieves the palm tree from the bowl.]

This'll work. He loves this. Here Slashy washy.

[He sets the palm tree down and Slash comes out of hiding.]

See? It's his favoritest thing in the whole world."

Rocksteady "Now to give him a shot of the juice.

[He pours the entire glassful on the turtle.]

Whoops! Used a little too much.

[The turtle begins mutating and growing.]

Wow!"

Slash "Daddy? What am I doing here?

[Bebop lifts him down off the table. He’s as tall as the mutant pair.]

What's going on?"

Rocksteady "We're going to work now. That's what's going on."

Slash "No. Why should I work for you?"

Bebop "Look, Slash."

Slash "My b--binky! My most favorite thing in the whole world!"

[Bebop holds up the palm tree and runs. Slash chases him. The turtles have returned to the sewers and upon hearing voices, stop to listen. Hackenbrush is addressing a group of men in business suits.]

Hackenbrush "We're going to turn this whole area into luxury condominiums."

Leonardo "The city will be without a sewer system."

Donatello "And we'll be out of a home."

Hackenbrush "The city is so overcrowded, there's no place left to build. Here we can provide the finest in subterranean living. Now, here's where we put the parking lot."

[He takes a piece of chalk and draws an X on a brick wall. Raphael throws a sai directly into the center of the X.]

Raphael "That's what you think, bub!"

Hackenbrush "Didn't I tell you these turtles were a menace?"

Michelangelo "You're trying to rip off the city, dude!"

Donatello "And when they find out about it, your little plan will be sunk."

Raphael "Yeah, now beat it! The sewer's too good for the likes of you."

Hackenbrush "It's time to do something about those turtles!"

[The men all run away. Back at the Technodrome, Bebop fits Slash with armor.]

Bebop "There. You look just beau-ti-ful."

Slash "My binky, where is it?"

Bebop "You can have it again..."

[He waves the palm tree in front of Slash as Rocksteady hands Slash a broom.]

Rocksteady "After you get rid of all the cobwebs."

Slash "Kind of pushy, ain't you?"

Rocksteady "Gee, he sure takes after you."

Bebop "Well, you know what they say. "Like father, like mutant.""

[Slash runs around the room dusting things. Bebop holds up the palm tree again.]

Slash "My binky!"

[He growls when Bebop pulls it away from him.]

Bebop "That's enough for now. You can see it again after you sweep the floor."

Slash "You guys are starting to make me mad."

[He inhales deeply and then blows on all the dust, raising a cloud that causes Bebop and Rocksteady to start coughing. Bebop drops the palm tree down a floor grate.]

Bebop "Uh-oh."

Slash "Where's my binky?"

Bebop "Uh, I seem to have misplaced it."

Slash "W--w--what? I want my binky! And you'd better find it!"

[He throws a table and it smashes against the wall. Bebop and Rocksteady run and Slash chases them.]

Rocksteady "Ooh, now you've done it."

[They run past a wall where two swords are displayed. Slash stops long enough to grab the swords and starts slashing the air with them.]

Bebop "Uh-oh. Shredder's Shaolin swords."

Rocksteady "We gotta stop him before he wrecks the whole joint!"

Bebop "I think he's too strong for us."

Rocksteady "Then we gotta get rid of him somehow.

[They enter a room containing the trans-dimensional portal device.]

Get that portal fired up."

Slash "Where's my binky? I want it!"

Bebop "There it is.

[He points at the open portal.]

It went that way."

Slash "It better be!"

[Slash lifts Bebop on the tip of his swords and flings him across the room.]

Bebop "Mama!"

[Slash enters the portal and drops onto a New York City street. Rocksteady helps Bebop pull his head out of one of the machines.]

Rocksteady "At least we got rid of him."

Bebop "Yeah, but now we'd better clean up this mess before the boss catches us."

Slash "Okay, where's my binky?

[He yanks a street light out of the ground.]

I'll tear this whole place apart until I find it! Where's my binky?"

[He smashes a fire plug with the lamppost and then proceeds to go on a rampage, setting off alarms in shops along the street. At the Channel 6 news building, April is hard at work at her desk. Her phone rings.]

April "April here."

[The turtles are in disguise and calling her from a phone booth.]

Donatello "April, it's Donatello. Can you meet us in ten minutes at The Flying Pizza Inn?"

April "I'm on a deadline, guys!"

Donatello "But we've got proof that Fenton Q. Hackenbrush's sewer plan is a fraud."

April "Oh, this had better be good."

[Hackenbrush appears on the street with four conmen dressed as the ninja turtles.]

Hackenbrush "Now, have you four boys got the plan? You've got to commit a daring crime we can blame on the turtles, so if they blab to the authorities, no one will believe them. Now, I want you men to do a bank robbery."

Con Donatello "But we don't know how to crack a safe."

Hackenbrush "All right, so maybe a hold-up."

Con Raphael "Uh, we don't have a gun."

Hackenbrush "Well, what crimes do you know?"

Con Raphael "Eh, embezzlement?"

Hackenbrush "Oh, who ever heard of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle embezzlers!"

Con Raphael "Credit card fraud?"

Hackenbrush "Those aren't daring crimes! I've got to ruin those turtles' reputation somehow."

[They hear a crashing noise and then see Slash smash trough a brick wall. A car honks and almost hits him. Slash stops the car one-handed, crumpling the front end in the process.]

Slash "Watch where you are going!"

Hackenbrush "Who is he? He's not one of those other turtles. Hey, you! Come here. I want to talk to you."

[Slash approaches him.]

Slash "Have you got my binky?"

Hackenbrush "Your binky?"

Slash "It's my--my palm tree. I--I want it!"

Hackenbrush "Uh, no, I don't have it.

[Slash lifts him by his lapels.]

But I could get you one."

[Slash sets him down.]

Slash "You could?"

Hackenbrush "Of course! And a great big palm tree, too! A whole bunch of them! Why, I could even set you up with a condo in Florida."

Slash "What's a Florida?"

Hackenbrush "It's a magical place where palm trees grow right out of the ground."

Slash "And I suppose you want me to do something for you."

Hackenbrush "That's it! I want you to go to the Freedom Bell."

Slash "The what?"

Hackenbrush "The Freedom Bell, the city's most beloved landmark. What are you, some kind of foreigner?"

Slash "As a matter of fact, I am."

Hackenbrush "Just go there and smash it! And smash everything you can on your way there. Then meet me at this address and we'll get you your palm trees. Just go, smash! Have fun with it!

[Slash walks away.]

This is great! When those turtles get blamed for wrecking the Freedom Bell, nobody’ll believe them!"

Slash "I'll smash anything to get a palm tree! Eyuh!"

[He starts smashing a car. Cut to the turtles, who are walking down a sidewalk.]

Leonardo "Come on, we've got to be on time for our meeting with April."

[Raphael does his Humphrey Bogart impression.]

Raphael "Then we'll blow the lid off this sewer caper.

[Normal voice.]

Oh, I feel so hard-boiled in these trench coats.

[His coat catches on a store-front gate.]

Hey, guys I'm stuck!"

[Donatello tries to pull him free.]

Donatello "Boy, is it ever caught."

Raphael "Don't rip it!"

Leonardo "You'd better take it off."

[Raphael slips out of the coat.]

Raphael "Uh, guys—"

[Running along the sidewalk towards them are a group of angry people.]

Man 1 "Look, it's the Turtles!"

Donatello "What are they so miffed about?"

Man 2 "They're the ones who smashed my car!"

Man 3 "They're the ones who wrecked my store!"

Michelangelo "We are?"

Leonardo "They sure think we are. Run!"

Donatello "This doesn't make sense! We didn't do any of those things."

Raphael "Try telling them that."

Michelangelo "Here they come!"

[They continue fleeing from the angry mob. Meanwhile, in the Technodrome, Bebop and Rocksteady make repairs.]

Bebop "There, just like new."

[Parts fall out of the bottom of the device they’re repairing.]

Shredder "What the devil's going on here? What happened to this door?"

Rocksteady "Um... I slipped on a banana peel when I came in?"

Shredder "Krang, get up here! You two have got a lot of explaining to do!"

[April waits inside the pizza parlor.]

April "Those turtles said they'd be here by now. Where are they?"

[Outside, Slash walks towards the pizza parlor. He stops next to a traffic light signaling green.]

Slash "A palm tree!

[He bends the post.]

You're not a palm tree.

[He punches the lights out and catches a scent.]

I don't know what it is, but it sure smells good.

[He smashes through the door of the pizza parlor.]

Rah!"

April "There you are! Where did you get that stupid disguise?

[Slash starts munching on pizza.]

Hey, I'm on a deadline. I don't have all night to waste.

[Slash keeps eating.]

And I've got to cover the launching of the space scow at dawn. Will you quit eating and talk to me? What's this hot story you've got? Don't just look at me. I need some answers. Will you cut it out? I didn't come all this way just to watch you eat!"

Slash "Back off, lady!"

April "O--okay. Don't have a fit!

[She screams and runs outside. Slash chases her.]

What's gotten into him?"

[She dives into the Channel 6 news van. Slash arrives and starts smashing it. April slides out of the van.]

Slash "Now I'm ready to go smash the Freedom Bell."

[Slash takes off. Back at the Technodrome, the pair of mutants complete their explanations.]

Bebop "And so, that's what happened."

Shredder "You mean you made your own super-mutant turtle and didn't even tell us?"

Krang "And then you let him get away?"

Rocksteady "But he was wreckin' the joint."

Krang "Who cares? We could have used a mutant like that."

Shredder "You're going to have to get him back!"

[They both gulp. Back in the city, the turtles are all disguised and have continued their journey to meet April.]

Donatello "Well, at least we got away from that mob."

Michelangelo "There's something mega fishy about all this, dudes."

Leonardo "Hackenbrush must be trying to ruin our reputation so no one will believe us."

Raphael "Hey, there's someone who'll believe us."

April "Oh, no you don't! Stay back!"

Donatello "What's the matter, April?"

April "You know darn well what the matter is! Which one of you thought it would be cute to turn my van into a sardine can?"

Leonardo "What are you talking about? We've been trying to meet up with you."

Donatello "Yeah, but this angry mob's been chasing us all night."

April "Then that must have been some other turtle."

Raphael "Oh, great. Just what this show needs, another mutant turtle."

April "But he looked like you. He even liked pizza."

Leonardo "Then he's been doing all the stuff we're getting blamed for."

April "And he said something about smashing the Freedom Bell!"

Michelangelo "The Freedom Bell? That unpatriotic dude!"

April "I just hope I can get another news van in time to cover the space scow launch."

[Slash climbs onto the Freedom Bell platform and prepares to slice it with his sword.]

Raphael "All right, buster! Hold it right there! There ain't enough room in this town for five mutant turtles!"

Slash "Oh, yeah? There's only one box turtle... me!

[He slashes at the turtles, who jump out of the way.]

Yugh!"

Donatello "Yah!

[He strikes Slash on the head with his bō, but it snaps in two.]

Ah, gee, that was my favorite bō.

[Slash grabs him by the belt and tosses him into the water.]

Whoa!"

[Raphael and Leonardo grab Slash’s carapace, but he gets free and grabs them instead. He picks both of them up and throws them.]

Raphael "Yah-ha!"

[Michelangelo swings his turtle line and throws it at Slash, who catches it. He yanks and throws Michelangelo into a water fountain with the other turtles.]

Raphael "This is gonna be tougher than I thought."

Leonardo "You're giving turtles a bad name, pal."

[He crosses swords with Slash, but Slash break both of Leonardo’s katana. Slash balances on his swords, using his feet to lift and throw Leonardo into the fountain.]

Leonardo "Whoa!"

[Slash jumps onto the Freedom Bell platform again and slashes the concrete posts holding the bell. It falls with clang. Then Slash lifts the bell overhead and throws it.]

Raphael "Uh-oh."

Leonardo "Catch it!"

Raphael "I can't believe I'm doing this."

[The bell lands on and traps all four ninja turtles.]

Slash "Now to find that man and get my palm tree."

Leonardo "Well--

[winces]

--we saved the Freedom Bell."

Raphael "Yeah, but we wrecked our backs."

Donatello "We'd better get out from under here."

Michelangelo "Whatever rings your chimes, dudes.

[They manage to lift the bell and toss it away.]

Come on, let's stop that gonzo turtle."

[In an office building, Slash confronts the receptionist.]

Receptionist "Mr. Hackenbrush isn't here right now. He's with all the others at the space scow launch on the other side of town."

Slash "Okay, but he'd better have my reward!"

[In the Technodrome, Bebop and Rocksteady climb into a Technowing.]

Shredder "This Technowing will get you there in a hurry. And don't come back without that turtle! Krang, the portal!"

[Krang throws a switch to open the portal. The Technowing jets through. At the launch site for the space scow, Hackenbrush is giving April another interview.]

Hackenbrush "I'm telling you those turtles must be stopped! They've been on a rampage all night. Why, I heard they even destroyed the Freedom Bell."

April "And just how would you know that, Mr. Hackenbrush?"

Hackenbrush "Uh, well-- I have very good sources."

April "And isn't it true there's a fifth turtle who's been causing all the destruction, and that he's your employee?"

Hackenbrush "Preposterous! What would I be doing with a bunch of smelly turtles? Why, I've never even seen a turtle in my life."

[Slash appears and picks up Hackenbrush. April continues filming.]

Slash "I broke the bell for you. Now where's my reward?"

[Hackenbrush laughs awkwardly.]

Hackenbrush "Uh, do I know you?"

[The turtles continue searching for Slash.]

Leonardo "Come on, we've gotta find him."

Raphael "Yeah, but what are we gonna do with him when we find him?"

[Slash appears on a television in a store window.]

Michelangelo "Check it out, dudes!"

Hackenbrush "I swear I've never met this turtle before in my life!"

[The image cuts to the space scow.]

Announcer "The trash is being loaded—"

[It cuts back to Slash.]

Slash "You lying creep! It would serve you right if I just stole your stinking rocket and trashed this whole city!"

Donatello "If he dumps that rocket on the city, it'll be a catastrophe."

Michelangelo "Not to mention a mess."

[The Technowing flies overhead and then lands on the street in front of the turtles.]

Raphael "More bad news."

Rocksteady "Aw, nuts! It's just the regular turtles."

Michelangelo "Oh, yeah? What's so regular about us?"

Bebop "Under normal circumstances, we'd just love to stick around and pound your shells flat."

Rocksteady "But we gotta find that other turtle, Slash."

Donatello "You're after that maniac, too?"

[The turtles throw off their disguises and jump into the Technowing. They throw Bebop and Rocksteady out.]

Rocksteady "W--Whoa!"

Bebop "Hey, where you goin'?"

Raphael "Sorry, boys. We want that turtle worse than you do."

[Leonardo takes the control and they jet off. At the launch site, Slash has started climbing the side of the umbilical tower.]

Announcer "Please clear the service structure and pad of all non-operational personnel."

Donald J. Lofty "What's going on here, Hackenbrush?"

Hackenbrush "Uh, uh, nothing, uh, Mr. Lofty."

[The Space Scow’s engines ignite.]

Lofty "He's engaged the manual controls!"

Slash "Now to mess this city up."

[The space craft launches. The turtles fly after it.]

Leonardo "Somebody's gonna have to get on that rocket."

Michelangelo "Then what are we waiting for, dudes?

[The hatch opens and he throws his turtle line, hooking a handrail on the side of the rocket.]

Cowabunga!"

[He and Donatello swing on top of the Space Scow.]

April "It's the Turtles!"

Lofty "I thought you said those turtles were outlaws."

April "His turtle's an outlaw. My turtles are heroes!"

[Michelangelo and Donatello drop into the space craft.]

Slash "You jerks just made a bad move."

[He charges into them, knocking down a pile of junk, and grabs them by their throats.]

Donatello "We're gonna have to distract him so I can get to those controls."

[A pizza box falls down.]

Michelangelo "April said he dug pizza."

[They manage to kick Slash off of them.]

Donatello "Yah!"

Michelangelo "Pizza time, dude!"

[Michelangelo waves the pizza box at Slash.]

Slash "Give me that pizza!"

[Donatello reaches the controls and sees the rocket is headed towards a skyscraper.]

Donatello "Oh, no!"

[He yanks back on the controls pulls the rocket’s nose up. Michelangelo slides to the back.]

Michelangelo "Whoooa!"

Slash "I want that pizza!

[He slides down and grabs the pizza box. Opening it, he discovers it’s empty.]

What? No pizza? You tricked me! Everybody tricks me!"

[Michelangelo runs to join Donatello.]

Michelangelo "This is bad news, bud!"

[A wailing and angry Slash runs to the control panel as the turtles dive out of the way. Slash puts his fists through the panel.]

Donatello "Aw, now we're really in trouble. He smashed the controls. The rocket’ll go straight up forever."

Michelangelo "Time to boogey!"

[They quickly climb out through the hatch. Slash attempts to follow.]

Slash "You creeps!"

[Donatello slams the lid shut on top of him. Donatello then grabs his turtlecom.]

Donatello "Guys, I hope you're with us."

[He and Michelangelo jump.]

Michelangelo "Cowabuuuuungaaaa!"

[The pair land on top of the Technowing.]

Slash "This sure has been a rotten day.

[He sits with his chin in his hands and then suddenly brightens up. On the pile of junk sits his palm tree.]

Binky!"

[Krang and Shredder watch from the Technodrome.]

Shredder "Hurry up, Krang! Lock it in!

[A portal opens in front of the rocket and it goes through, straight into the Technodrom.]

We have him!"

Slash "That's what you think! Get trashed!"

[He pulls a lever and a hatch under the rocket opens, dumping junk on Shredder and Krang.]

Shredder "Ah!"

[Slash pilots the Space Scow right through the side of the Technodrome and jets away.]

Slash "Wee-hee-hee-hee-hee!"

[The turtles land the Technowing and jump out to join April, Lofty and Hackenbrush.]

Lofty "All right, Hackenbrush, you've got some explaining to do!"

Leonardo "Do you know this guy was gonna wipe out the whole sewer system so he could build condos?"

Lofty "So, you were going to deceive the whole city, were you?

[He looks at the turtles.]

This isn't the first time you four have helped me. I promise that as long as I'm around, the sewers will be safe.

[To Hackenbrush.]

And you... are fired!"

[The turtles return to the lair.]

Donatello "Ah. The good ol' sewers. They may be smelly..."

Raphael "And damp..."

Michelangelo "And kinda disgusting."

Leonardo "But they're our home."

Splinter "How true, my wards. The quality of a home is not its size or opulence, but the quality of the people who live there."

Donatello "Amen to that."

[Raphael opens a hatch on the side of a wall as is hit by a flood of muddy water.]

Raphael "On the other hand, a clean, dry penthouse apartment would be nice for a change."

[End Credits]