I Dream of Jesus

I Dream of Jesus
Peter discovers and befriends Jesus.

Season: 7 Episode: 2
Total Episode Count: 112
Prod. no.: 6ACX05
First Aired: October 5, 2008

Guest Starring: Perez Hilton, Ike Barinholtz
Featuring: Peter Griffin, Jesus Christ
Also Appearing: Lois, Brian, Chris, Meg, Stewie, Cleveland, George W. Bush, Marlee Matlin, Jay Leno, Tom Tucker, God, Mayor Adam West, Paris Hilton, Perez Hilton, Dane Cook, Star Jones, Dave Coulier, Effeminate cow, Nicole Richie, The Pussycat Dolls
Musical Numbers: Surfin' Bird, uncensored version: Me and Jesus

Director: Mike Kim

While dining at the Nifty Fifties Diner, a 1950s-themed restaurant, Peter Griffin hears his favorite song, "Surfin' Bird" by The Trashmen," on the jukebox. One of the employees removes the record because it's a 1960s song and thus wouldn't exist in the '50s, so Peter offers to trade Meg for sex in exchange for it. He begins driving everyone crazy by endlessly playing and singing to it, and even squanders the family's savings to make a public service announcement where he can do so on TV. Before they completely lose their minds, Stewie and Brian steal the record in Peter's sleep. The next morning, Peter blames the family for the record's disappearance Stewie and Brian had smashed it à la Office Space before going out in an attempt to buy another copy. The clerk at the Dead Format Records store tells Peter they have sold all 63 copies at once to "a dog and a baby" before Peter notices that the clerk looks familiar, ultimately realizing he is Jesus Christ.

Jesus explains that he comes to Earth every century or so to unwind, but that he must also try to keep a low profile. Peter encourages Jesus to socialize and invites him over for dinner with his family, who recognize him as the messiah after he performs the miracles of turning vegetables into ice cream and making Lois' breasts become gigantic. Jesus has such a great time with the Griffins that he decides to make his second coming. At first no one seems to notice him, but when Peter loses a dollar in the wind and it lands in a public fountain, Jesus retrieves it by walking on the surface of the water in front of everyone, amazing them.

The word that Jesus has returned begins spreading when he starts appearing on The Tonight Show and the MTV Music Video Awards, and he becomes a celebrity. He is caught up in his new-found popularity that he begins to neglect his friendship with Peter, sending all his cell phone calls to voice mail, prompting Peter to use Lois' cell phone to complain. Soon Jesus gets arrested after a drinking binge and ending up unconscious at Mary-Kate Olsen's house before making Antisemitic comments. Jesus asks Peter for bail; Peter only heads over to the police station when Jesus makes a lamp in Peter's living room smash into Peter's head. With Jesus in disrepute, he decides that maybe he wasn't mature enough to return to the world, but Peter remarks that the maturity of his statement might mean the day he'll be ready may not be too far off. Before he leaves this world, Jesus gives Peter a present of another record of "Surfin' Bird" to annoy his family with.

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